anomicdeer
Well-known member
I could never really gain a friend. When I was younger I had them, if friend is the appropriate name. They talk bad about me when I was away from them and even once in front of me while whispering to another one. That is why I assume how people think of me. Especially with the looks I get. The disgusted looks on there face. Whether it be my hair, skin color, or face expression or all. They don't understand that they work hard but don't not exactly, because they have more and don't need to do anything. They would never want to walk to the store for grocery shopping. They would never wait one hour or even a few hours waiting for a ride. They won't know how it is to walk across the highway every day because they were lucky enough to even get a job. They won't know what I dealt with in school and currently. But then again, obviously it's exactly the problem. I HAVE TO walk everywhere. I CAN'T gain a friend. I DON'T smile. I WON'T success. I'm don't blame anyone. I am so envious looking around at what others have and realize how much of a slack I was and am. It only makes me WISH and TRY to be like them. Even if I fail in the end. I will keep trying. It won't matter to them. They won't realize it. But it matters to me.