my arch rival! OCD

[durda_dan]

i say it so many times. and i don't even know what to say anymore.
I hate OCD. i dispise you with all my passion, my being. Your nothing but the devil in my head!

Speaking of, i now have a new worry, a hypochondria worry.
I was reading someone got necrotizing fasciitis (flesh eating disease) and now i am worried i will contract it if i don't do everything carefully and cleanly.
OCD is ruining my life!

it honestly gets me so angry! sometimes i just want to cry. infact i do cry sometimes. i feel so weak and helpless with OCD. i am 22 years old, at the top of my game. i am getting married soon. i am supposed to be a strong loving father, and husband. how can i be strong when i cry so often? how can i be a loving husband and father if i obsess about deadly and violent thoughts all day. how can i protect my child from bad things when i can't protect myself. When i have a child will i have hypochondria thoughts about him, and take him/her to the hospital every weak to check his health?
how can my child grow up and not be embarressed of his whacko dad.
what is wrong with my head....

 

[Harleyq]

I'm sorry to say I don't have much help in the way of your worries about becoming a good dad and husband, since I don't have OCD and don't feel qualified to offer that kind of advice. However, I wanted to tell you that crying is not a sign of weakness. We've conditioned ourselves to believe that way because of social stigmas but human beings are meant to cry as a way to relieve stress. It's healthy for you and it releases emotional-hormones to help you calm down. There's nothing wrong with that and in fact, it's better for you and those around you to cry and let your stress out than to hold it in because you feel you need to "be a man" by societal standards. Believe me, you'll be much stronger with some of that stress expelled from you than you'll be if you bottle it all in.

Hopefully, other board members can give you some more sound judgment, but I just wanted to let you know that you don't have to feel bad, at all, about crying occasionally, and it doesn't make you any less of a man or any weaker...and I hope that comforts you at least a little bit

I hope you start to feel better and that your OCD improves *hugs*.

 

[Dudley]

I have the same feelings dude. I'm not in a relationship or anything right now but I know one of my biggest fears is "will my future child(ren) end up having OCD too?" It's a lot to think about and really scary at times but life simply isn't fair a lot of the time. If we learn to adapt and roll with what we have, we'll end up being happier people.

It's kind of lame to boil it down to "persistence" but just keep at it and give it everything you've got. We'll put that pushy little Disorder in his place one of these days.

 

[Old_Man]

Durda Dan,

Hi, Bro, I'm not a member of this forum, but do have OCD, was browsing, happened to see your post expressing your fears re your coming marriage.

Before anything else, Congrats. I hope marriage and family bring you as much joy as they have me.

I'm 45 years old, have been married 15 yrs, have 2 lovely children, neither of whom have shown any signs of sharing our situation. I live overseas, a place with sun and palms, have a successful professional career, earn 6 figures, and have traveled much of the world, all while battling fairly severe case. Kids consider me a good, strong Dad, & wife considers me a good and attractive husband. Point here is, it's do-able. I just wanted to send you some reassurance, hopefully boost your confidence. You can do it, if a nut-ball like myself does.

Most important thing I can offer you is to suggest that you make sure your wife is truly cool with your situation, and is understanding. I've been fortunate in that way. If she's understanding, supportive, you'll be able to raise your kids and get through your life. I've gone through it, mostly, without psychiatric or chemical treatment. Again, my case is fairly strong, and I do some heavily strange sh*t due to compulsions, though it's harmless, it can be conspicuous and I'm sure it looks awfully bizarre to those unitiated.

In short, Man, you're not alone. I send my love, encouragement and best wishes for your happiness in your coming marriage. You can do it if you want to.