middle aged woman told me...
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women are socialized to stand by their man no matter what. it doesn't matter that we have gone through the sexual revolution and have supposedly been liberated. most women will stick it through.
the flip side of this is that women don't support one another enough. they see each other as competition for a man's attention and when they get a man they put most of their focus on the man.
I'm not saying all women are like this, but it is very common. even in today's society, the man comes first. that is why women settle for jerks.
the flip side of this is that women don't support one another enough. they see each other as competition for a man's attention and when they get a man they put most of their focus on the man.
I'm not saying all women are like this, but it is very common. even in today's society, the man comes first. that is why women settle for jerks.
this_portrait
Well-known member
I couldn't agree more. I once had a friend who, not long after she started dating her now ex-boyfriend, got plastered for the first time (even though she supposedly had strict non-drinking standards) at a party. The reason? One of his ex-girlfriends was there, and all the guys (including her piece of shit boyfriend) started pressuring her to 'out-drink' the girl (because the ex wouldn't drink). So she did, and then she later called me bawling her eyes out, saying things like, "He knows I don't even drink. If he's supposed to care about me, why would he let me get drunk?!" After the whole situation happened, she later told me that she doesn't like getting along with girls. She didn't give any reasons why.
I hate it when a girl gets all defensive over her boyfriend, as if some other girl is just going to 'steal' him away. Honey, no one 'steals' him away at all; he goes willingly, and when you're being a clingy bitch and constantly acting more like his mother than his girlfriend, I don't blame him for leaving. The same is true for guys who are possessive of their girlfriends.
I also think that every person's definition of an 'asshole' is different. But I think we all have a pretty general idea of what an asshole is.
cainke
Member
Lol......
I've dated 3 guys. One was an asshole, but he ended up falling for me, and I broke his heart.
I feel like this is a recurring incident.
Minus the asshole part.
Every guy I have dated has ended up telling me he's in love with me.
And I'm just cold hearted enough to not care.. or not let myself care.
I'm pretty good at holding back feelings.. not that I enjoy it, it just scares me.
And it always makes me feel like I'll never get married.
I've dated 3 guys. One was an asshole, but he ended up falling for me, and I broke his heart.
I feel like this is a recurring incident.
Minus the asshole part.
Every guy I have dated has ended up telling me he's in love with me.
And I'm just cold hearted enough to not care.. or not let myself care.
I'm pretty good at holding back feelings.. not that I enjoy it, it just scares me.
And it always makes me feel like I'll never get married.
JCS008
Well-known member
I once dated a girl who I thought I was in love with. Of course, it wasn't love it was more of an infactuation. I was loyal, caring and nice to her. I bended over backwards for her. I'd drive over 40 minutes to her house some nights to see her, and I would even go at around 2am, even though I'd have work the next morning. I'd drive about 45 in city traffic to go see her while she was at work. I pretty much drove everywhere since she didn't have a license. I put off spending time with family and friends to spend extra time with her.
She dumped me about once a month it seemed. It almost became clockwork. She'd find a reason to leave me. Some of them were, her dad didn't approve of her dating, she didn't think I was good enough, I was too nice, I was scaring her away by being so caring and bending over backwards for her or I wasn't caring enough. I would fight for our relationship for hours and try to sell her on us and staying together.
She constantly said I was naive since I was opptimistic about life. Since I believed that people could be genuinely good. I thought I would amount to a lot, but she said I never would, because its unrealistic. Basically, she called me a child for being opptimistic and having a positive outlook on life. To her, I was a child and I should be more demanding in life, put myself before others and be more of a hard nosed person.
Eventually, she dumped me again. This time because I couldn't make it out into the city at around midnight to pick up her and her friend from a club.
But this time I didn't spend three hours on the phone trying to beg her to come back. I said Ok. Fine, it's over. I had enough and she finally pushed me to the edge. She pretty much spent the next six months chasing me. Coming to my campus to see me, showing up when I was meeting my friends to go hang out. Calling me, IMing me, E-Mailing me. Each time I said no. Eventually she stopped when I began dating another girl a few months later.
The lesson here is through it all, I don't blame her for the way things turned out. I could easily be angry that she wanted me to be an asshole and took for granted how much I cared about her and how nice I was to her. The ironic thing was that she was right. I was naive. I was too nice. She was the one who turned me into an asshole by dumping me monthly. After we broke up when she was chasing me, I was a cold blooded asshole. I ignored her, I was blunt with her, and I told her straight up how she treated me like garbage and took everything I did for her for granted. And that she messed up. I became the person, the asshole, that she wanted. But of course, the end result is that you always want what you can't have.
The women who want that asshole will one day strive for the nice guy instead. And eventually there is someone who will appreciate what you do for them.
She dumped me about once a month it seemed. It almost became clockwork. She'd find a reason to leave me. Some of them were, her dad didn't approve of her dating, she didn't think I was good enough, I was too nice, I was scaring her away by being so caring and bending over backwards for her or I wasn't caring enough. I would fight for our relationship for hours and try to sell her on us and staying together.
She constantly said I was naive since I was opptimistic about life. Since I believed that people could be genuinely good. I thought I would amount to a lot, but she said I never would, because its unrealistic. Basically, she called me a child for being opptimistic and having a positive outlook on life. To her, I was a child and I should be more demanding in life, put myself before others and be more of a hard nosed person.
Eventually, she dumped me again. This time because I couldn't make it out into the city at around midnight to pick up her and her friend from a club.
But this time I didn't spend three hours on the phone trying to beg her to come back. I said Ok. Fine, it's over. I had enough and she finally pushed me to the edge. She pretty much spent the next six months chasing me. Coming to my campus to see me, showing up when I was meeting my friends to go hang out. Calling me, IMing me, E-Mailing me. Each time I said no. Eventually she stopped when I began dating another girl a few months later.
The lesson here is through it all, I don't blame her for the way things turned out. I could easily be angry that she wanted me to be an asshole and took for granted how much I cared about her and how nice I was to her. The ironic thing was that she was right. I was naive. I was too nice. She was the one who turned me into an asshole by dumping me monthly. After we broke up when she was chasing me, I was a cold blooded asshole. I ignored her, I was blunt with her, and I told her straight up how she treated me like garbage and took everything I did for her for granted. And that she messed up. I became the person, the asshole, that she wanted. But of course, the end result is that you always want what you can't have.
The women who want that asshole will one day strive for the nice guy instead. And eventually there is someone who will appreciate what you do for them.
no1
Banned
This doesn't even make sense to me.
U
userremoved
Guest
Well if these guys are genuinely falling in love with you, you must have something good going on. Which is a good sign. Find out what you're afraid of and overcome it and you'll get married.
no1
Banned
deception can be powerful.. if you are unconsciously willing, or even consciously unconsciously willing to be deceived.
no1
Banned
I'm the same way with assholes. I don't get along with them at all.
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