alienin2004
Member
hey guys..a bit of dillema so thought id ask..
Ok I know this girl for 8-9months now..used to chat on the net coz she ws in a different city..got introduced to her by my now best friend..so she came down in March for a bit..we hung out for a few days..it was cool..I developed a crush/infatuation towards her as shes very pretty..So I just told her then only that I'm starting to like you..to which she said shes just coming from a break up n stuff and is not looking forward for anything right now..and I knew that and to be honest wasnt expecting anything..Was just being honest as a friend and I said i know your situation its cool..I just thought of being
honest ..that is it ..its no big deal.
So she went back to her city and we didnt stay in touch much..just an odd text or two..as normal friends..and I was well and truly over her.Now shes been back for a couple of months and we end up meeting quite often..like 5-6times/week or so..And I again started to like her..and told her this but this time I knew this isnt right for me..(knowing her scenario and im also just generally happy being alone and flirting around harmlessly).So I told her that this is happening to me again and I would like to take a little break and not be in touch for a few days and stuff and get back to being friends again after a while!
Initially she said ok..its not that I dont feel for you..but if you do want a break its ok you can have it. So we didnt meet up for a few days nor keep in touch..and it was cool..I missed her a bit...but then I joined kickboxing classes again and doing more stuff which I like and I was quite ok.
We did meet a couple of times in the week..both of the times she said she's not well so If I could pick her up from work and drop her home she would be thankful ..and to which I said ok..being her friend n all. So I kept my distance for a week.But then last week, she kept sending romantic forward texts and stuff..and we got texting again and it ended in that she likes me too but she wants to take it slow..to which I said ok.. (also she told me it was just an excuse to meet you..the pickup from work im sick thing)
So since last week, we've met everyday, for a few hours. Now Im generally the kinda guy whose either 100% or 0%..but shes someone I like a lot so I thought I'd give it a go.
But a couple of incidences have happened which make me think what is going on.
Yesterday being a saturday I thought we'd spend it together and watch a movie or something..But at 2pm she tells me she is going with her friends..Her friend has a spare ticket so she has ordered her to come..and Shes going for the 3.20pm show..I said oki..I was hurt a bit that she'd not even consider watching it with me or asking me as well or something..Not that I wouldve gone with her friends..Im not a psycho that i need to be everywhere with her..but she potrayed it in such a manner that I felt ok..one spare ticket..so they asked her..and she said ok..no big deal.
(But then we were talking in the car and it turns out her friend had asked her at 11.30am if she wanted to come and she said alright.)
So then I also asked my friends after that and I also thought even I would go with my friends. But when I was buying the tickets at 4pm she calls me saying her friends have cancelled the show..Where am I ..What am I doing..( I just live next to two theatres so she was just down my buildin only)..I told her im buying tickets for the movie and if she woud like to come I would take her ticket out as well.to whcih she said okay..So then I met her and I introduced her to my friends and watched the movie together. I felt a bit of a backup than anything to be honest..maybe Im reading too much into it.
Then theres another incident 2-3days back, she had a interview at 3pm..So we were texting around 12afternoon..good morning and stuff.so she said she'll see me after her interview. I said alright.Around 1.30 in the afternoon she had come down next to my building in a mall..to meet her friends.They had a 2pm movie show..So she had come then to see them.Around 1.50 when they left for the movie..and she was alone..she calls me up..But i didnt have my mobile with me so I called her back 20minutes later ..she said she was down with her friends so thought of seeing me too.I thought how sweet
and then we met up after her interview. I didnt know that she had reached there at 1.30pm and had called me at 1.50pm just when her friends had gone..This i came to know when we were talking so she told me she had reached there at 1.30 pm n stuff and didnt have company to eat then as her friends had gone..so had called me. Here I was thinking she wanted me to come as well when she with her friends..but it turns out I was called after she had noone left there
Now I've not been in a relationship in 4years..I just find it better to be single and stuff..Basically overly sentimental and expectations kinda guy..So a lot of times im thinking i am better off without anyone..Just being friends..doing my work and following my hobbies and enjoying life without any expectations from anyone..without anyone affecting me.
What should I do ? This is a nice girl..whose very pretty..I could trust her and stuff..But perhaps we are different..Shes too practical and I am not.I really wont mind being friends with her..Just friends..meeting once or twice a week and hanging out.No expectations..nothing. But on the other hand I feel I should give her some more time and see how it goes..but I dont know if its working for me..or even If I would want a relationship as we are quite different.
Sorry for the long..less paragrahed post.if anyone bothered to read it..please do give me your input
I have SA and quite a bit of shyness..hence Im posting here..I frequent the board a lot...You guys are awesome..
Thanks a lot !
Ok I know this girl for 8-9months now..used to chat on the net coz she ws in a different city..got introduced to her by my now best friend..so she came down in March for a bit..we hung out for a few days..it was cool..I developed a crush/infatuation towards her as shes very pretty..So I just told her then only that I'm starting to like you..to which she said shes just coming from a break up n stuff and is not looking forward for anything right now..and I knew that and to be honest wasnt expecting anything..Was just being honest as a friend and I said i know your situation its cool..I just thought of being
honest ..that is it ..its no big deal.
So she went back to her city and we didnt stay in touch much..just an odd text or two..as normal friends..and I was well and truly over her.Now shes been back for a couple of months and we end up meeting quite often..like 5-6times/week or so..And I again started to like her..and told her this but this time I knew this isnt right for me..(knowing her scenario and im also just generally happy being alone and flirting around harmlessly).So I told her that this is happening to me again and I would like to take a little break and not be in touch for a few days and stuff and get back to being friends again after a while!
Initially she said ok..its not that I dont feel for you..but if you do want a break its ok you can have it. So we didnt meet up for a few days nor keep in touch..and it was cool..I missed her a bit...but then I joined kickboxing classes again and doing more stuff which I like and I was quite ok.
We did meet a couple of times in the week..both of the times she said she's not well so If I could pick her up from work and drop her home she would be thankful ..and to which I said ok..being her friend n all. So I kept my distance for a week.But then last week, she kept sending romantic forward texts and stuff..and we got texting again and it ended in that she likes me too but she wants to take it slow..to which I said ok.. (also she told me it was just an excuse to meet you..the pickup from work im sick thing)
So since last week, we've met everyday, for a few hours. Now Im generally the kinda guy whose either 100% or 0%..but shes someone I like a lot so I thought I'd give it a go.
But a couple of incidences have happened which make me think what is going on.
Yesterday being a saturday I thought we'd spend it together and watch a movie or something..But at 2pm she tells me she is going with her friends..Her friend has a spare ticket so she has ordered her to come..and Shes going for the 3.20pm show..I said oki..I was hurt a bit that she'd not even consider watching it with me or asking me as well or something..Not that I wouldve gone with her friends..Im not a psycho that i need to be everywhere with her..but she potrayed it in such a manner that I felt ok..one spare ticket..so they asked her..and she said ok..no big deal.
(But then we were talking in the car and it turns out her friend had asked her at 11.30am if she wanted to come and she said alright.)
So then I also asked my friends after that and I also thought even I would go with my friends. But when I was buying the tickets at 4pm she calls me saying her friends have cancelled the show..Where am I ..What am I doing..( I just live next to two theatres so she was just down my buildin only)..I told her im buying tickets for the movie and if she woud like to come I would take her ticket out as well.to whcih she said okay..So then I met her and I introduced her to my friends and watched the movie together. I felt a bit of a backup than anything to be honest..maybe Im reading too much into it.
Then theres another incident 2-3days back, she had a interview at 3pm..So we were texting around 12afternoon..good morning and stuff.so she said she'll see me after her interview. I said alright.Around 1.30 in the afternoon she had come down next to my building in a mall..to meet her friends.They had a 2pm movie show..So she had come then to see them.Around 1.50 when they left for the movie..and she was alone..she calls me up..But i didnt have my mobile with me so I called her back 20minutes later ..she said she was down with her friends so thought of seeing me too.I thought how sweet
and then we met up after her interview. I didnt know that she had reached there at 1.30pm and had called me at 1.50pm just when her friends had gone..This i came to know when we were talking so she told me she had reached there at 1.30 pm n stuff and didnt have company to eat then as her friends had gone..so had called me. Here I was thinking she wanted me to come as well when she with her friends..but it turns out I was called after she had noone left there
Now I've not been in a relationship in 4years..I just find it better to be single and stuff..Basically overly sentimental and expectations kinda guy..So a lot of times im thinking i am better off without anyone..Just being friends..doing my work and following my hobbies and enjoying life without any expectations from anyone..without anyone affecting me.
What should I do ? This is a nice girl..whose very pretty..I could trust her and stuff..But perhaps we are different..Shes too practical and I am not.I really wont mind being friends with her..Just friends..meeting once or twice a week and hanging out.No expectations..nothing. But on the other hand I feel I should give her some more time and see how it goes..but I dont know if its working for me..or even If I would want a relationship as we are quite different.
Sorry for the long..less paragrahed post.if anyone bothered to read it..please do give me your input
I have SA and quite a bit of shyness..hence Im posting here..I frequent the board a lot...You guys are awesome..
Thanks a lot !
