ReaperCali
New member
When I was in my 18s and up. I was a lot more confident and friendly. I had lots of friends. I was quite happy at that time. I took full advantage of how far my limits were. I've been with many girls using my charm and sympathy to take advantage of their emotions for sex. Ended up breaking hearts, an outcome in which they had suffered. Also had friends, homies who looked up to me cause I was brave and loyal. They ran with me, I showed them techniques to making quick cash which was illegal. Most of them ended up in prison or dead, which they also had suffered. Couple years later at a point my life I took notice to what my actions had caused. Broken hearts, damaged lives I've inflicted not only to people I knew but to strangers and my family alike. Knowing I might have caused such damaged I kept repeating over and over in my head negative thoughts about myself. To a point where I see myself as a horrible being. Now I suffer a lot through my negative thoughts. Even though its not real what I might be seeing or hearing. I tend to get tense when I think people's watching. I believe this might be the effects of karma from this life. Now all I have are unethical thoughts to live with...so even though having SP, it's not too late to contribute to society to have good results in the next life...who knows do good now and you'll notice a few years later, all the fears which were thriving somehow retreated from your conscious. Thus realizing the effects of karma...
