mikebird
Banned
I opened an unexpected envelope while talking to Dad on Skype. I like showing things to people on video. The cards inside are so sharp I managed to cut myself on one of them. Dad is difficult to speak to. He soon hangs up. He's about the last person I get to speak with. He's old
I had a usual moment this morning, which often brings a tear :crying: whenever I look in the bathroom mirror for quite a while, closer & closer. I really do laugh.
A bit fulfilling, watching the salty water dribbling down my nose, chin, shirt, trousers and carpet. Splash. It is funny. Quite relaxing. Shaking
As I write, some really annoying bitch calls me, screaming at me getting me to buy here Project Management course starting at £1,000 and more. Couldn't get rid of her. Wanted to set a min £1 that I wouldn't be able to afford. I am used to losing the battle, with experience of clever psychologists demanding my attention and get an insight on my personality. Usually my way to make it easy for both of us that I'm not having it. I've learned not to say anything negative, such as my inability or unwillingness to proceed. After hours on a phone. It's easy to simply not pay up for something I don't want. Trying to be gleeful for no grounded reason is what I do.
Thinking about this wedding of an old schoolmate. Will be the fourth of weddings outside of my family (brothers, nieces, cousins) I get invited to
I'm keen to go, but the same loop of struggle when someone else is doing better and I am envious - a lot of effort to shine on & be gleeful. All the last three did not go well for me. I made a bit of a fool of myself?
Agreed? Sensitive? All around a social tumult, needing to gather people of the same status? Turn up or not?
Dad's funeral
I had a usual moment this morning, which often brings a tear :crying: whenever I look in the bathroom mirror for quite a while, closer & closer. I really do laugh.
A bit fulfilling, watching the salty water dribbling down my nose, chin, shirt, trousers and carpet. Splash. It is funny. Quite relaxing. Shaking
As I write, some really annoying bitch calls me, screaming at me getting me to buy here Project Management course starting at £1,000 and more. Couldn't get rid of her. Wanted to set a min £1 that I wouldn't be able to afford. I am used to losing the battle, with experience of clever psychologists demanding my attention and get an insight on my personality. Usually my way to make it easy for both of us that I'm not having it. I've learned not to say anything negative, such as my inability or unwillingness to proceed. After hours on a phone. It's easy to simply not pay up for something I don't want. Trying to be gleeful for no grounded reason is what I do.
Thinking about this wedding of an old schoolmate. Will be the fourth of weddings outside of my family (brothers, nieces, cousins) I get invited to
I'm keen to go, but the same loop of struggle when someone else is doing better and I am envious - a lot of effort to shine on & be gleeful. All the last three did not go well for me. I made a bit of a fool of myself?
Agreed? Sensitive? All around a social tumult, needing to gather people of the same status? Turn up or not?
Dad's funeral