Is their anything wrong with this (the way i view life)

OCDd

Well-known member
Warning: this is a depressing/sad thread so if you cant handle it, dont keep reading. anyways i personally dont see anything wrong with the way i view life, its just been my experience and i wont change no matter what. its sorta a rant to so sorry about that. (keep in mind these are my views and am i in know trying to insult yours) but i see the world as stupid. i see all the people, no matter who you are as selfish. i am selfish everyone i know is selfish, and lets face it we could all spend a little time on the weekends volunteering and the ratio of donations to income spent is probably not good. i just see the world as bad. their is murder, drugs, sex before marriage, stealing, very hypocritical disgrace, and just utter disgust. and yes i do even have a problem with sex, i think even if you are married to someone and love them very much sex is not good, reproducing is good but not sex, i hate when people give me the bullsh*t of oh it feels good and if you like them a lot its a nice thing to do i guess. no you are wrong, you are simply doing it for your own urges and benefit. you cant say i want to have sex sense its a good/nice thing to do when its really not. reproduction is good but not sex. to me life is a lot, A LOT of bad things, and very very few good things. and we just have to find the few good things. i am a very negative person and my views are negative. but they are logical and i am okay with being negative, in fact i like it. its motivation and i can focus much on being negative and i get more done that way. i am very disappointing with the world, society, and are way of living. like i told my therapist when she asked if i was okay with always feeling (the way she put it) 'disappointment' and i said yes, improvement only comes from disappointment. i just look at things down cause thats how they are. i hate school i think it is a scam and a waste of time, money and tax money past 9th grade. i mean people used to be successful just passing 5th grade and they were able to do stuff fine. and now we have to pay 8k a semester in college, what happened to free education. and on top of that, the kids like me who have a hard time getting good grades will be discriminated against and not allowed into certain colleges. so because i didnt study a foreign language and get a good grade and i didnt study something stupid i will not make as much salary because of it. i cant stand sluts, people who waste money, prostitutes, failure to recognize the world, bullies, politicians, government, people who want me to change, the general population/civilization, bad parents, people who are addicted to drugs or have done harsh drugs, people who smoke regular cigarettes, people who dont respect their body and dont keep it healthy, greed, abusers. i just cant stand stupid obama care and all this political crap. politics are evil and solve nothing but the increase of 'fairness' which fairness doesnt and wont exist. my mom had cancer and if she were to have it come back at her check up it would take about two weeks, maybe three to get the results back. if obama care takes effect, it would take two YEARS to get it back, her cancer is very aggressive and was given a 20% chance to live. she would die in like 3-4 months. i just hate the fact that i am mentally 'raped' all the time with contamination ocd it makes me think about things that i dont want to think about and i can be cause by someone just saying something random. plus i wont touch or even get near anything/anyone who i dont like. if i see a girl i will inappropriately dressed/has a stupid personality or is just a mean person/or who uses drugs i will not walk within like 20 feet of them and i will wash my hands a lot even if i have to go near them. we put in hours a lot and work hard for 5 days a week and we get like 2 days off. 8-12 hours a day x 5 is 45-60 hours a week and then what after you sleep in cause your tired you have like 14 hours a day (Saturday and Sunday) to enjoy yourself. no im sorry f*cking bullsh*t we live like 80 years, and 14 of them is in school and then you work for 50 years and have 15 years off. oh ok cool im old and cant do sh*t anymore except sit is not enjoying life. why cant we just enjoy life as it goes? oh thats right we can because we work hard and then we come home and its sh*t at home as well, chores, more work, making dinner, people will always be asking you to do stuff for them, and then you are stressed and get a crappy sleep and wake up and do it again. colleges are just so arrogant and evil. they force people to study so hard that they only get like 5 hours of sleep. my friend is in AP chemistry and pre calc and to get to the college he wants he has to take classes like that, sometimes he spends 10 - 15 hours of homework. no joke. so he has to get 4 hours of sleep some nights. and just the other day (I T-A in the office for my counselor because i was absent for 2 months because of my ocd and the school said i would they would kick me out of the district if i missed anymore so i had to drop one of my classes to stay in the district and repeat the class, very nice of the district isnt it?) so i was up in the office and a girl was crying because she was so stressed of doing work and stuff that she was crying because it had been 2 weeks and a college hadnt responded yet and she was getting worried that the college might say no... o_O so we have to get good grades, apply to you, and pay you 8k a semester sometimes 30 - 50k and you put this kind of stress on kids as what? 'competition'. wow thats just ridiculous. humans are just stupid i tell you. so i almost get kicked out for something thats not my control and their is a girl crying, wow thats ridiculous and this happens quite a bit. i am just fed up with life. its stupid. i just want to enjoy it and i dont want money it just want the image in my head of a good life and that not asking for much. thanks for reading this, all comments are appreciated.
 
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