Irrational fear of males

[Harleyq]

I didn't mean to sound like I was generalizing- I guess I should have said that I seem to be different from most of the women I have gotten to know or at least had a lot of interaction with- like my mother, sisters, coworkers, etc. And I'm not sure about my views actually being shared by men, but a lot of them just seem to be more laid back and approachable in my experience. I think in my case, I just have an easier time around people that are different from me- like older, younger, male, different race/ethnicity, etc. I guess it leaves less room for me to compare myself to them or feel like I'm being judged.

Ditto, I feel the exact same way. I can't even explain why or how, but I have a much easier time becoming friends with men, usually. Conversation just flows more smoothly than when I talk with women.

As far as the number of friends I've had over the years, men far outweigh women. However, when it comes to the quality of my relationships, my best friends have been women (although all of my friends are/have been people whom I consider myself close to...enough to consider them family).

 

[Jake123]

I kinda have a fear of men... I feel much more comfortable with women and they're easier to understand and I can be myself... but sometimes with men I get uneasy or intimidated and it's just generally very difficult for me to along with them or relate.

 

[Walk]

Everyone talks shit about the opposite sex at some point. You're new to this forum so you have probably not read a lot of the posts here yet. Most of the people speaking negatively about the opposite sex (on this forum) are males.
Take the OP for example...she expressed a fear of males but did not speak of men in a negative way.

You are right, women can be just as immoral as men. Common sense dictates this since women are not a separate species from men. The problem is that there are too many misconceptions about women and men in general. I've read one man in particular (on this thread) who says he cannot relate to women. That's obviously because he thinks that women are completely different than he his, than men are. Sure, we do lead different lives but we all have the same emotions and the same needs. I have found myself being able to relate to both men and women. I don't find a man foreign or unapproachable just because he has a penis and I do not.

Female sexual predators are becoming widespread? This has been happening recently in the last decade? I suppose it is the new century. It was about time we caught up to our male counterparts. I mean, is it some sort of new crime wave trend? That's pretty creepy. So do they run around with vibrators tucked into their trench coats? I'm just teasing. I do realize that there are female sexual predators, but I wasn't aware that women rapists are on the rise.

Women have been known as the fairer sex and it's not only women who have been responsible for propagating this false belief. Sure, feminists might want the world to believe that women are inculpable and righteous but that's a whole other animal . There are men (also women) out there who have a certain ideal of what constitutes femininity and they believe that women should be agreeable and accommodating at all times lest they be shrews (god forbid).

It takes two to tango and women are not soley responsible for gender beliefs and misconceptions even if Western society has been patriarchal for thousands of years and I'm sure it wasn't the majority of women who came up with the belief that women are inherently inferior morally, physically and intellectually. Only a misogynistic woman (yes, they do exist) would say such things about other women. Only a manipulative woman would try to make others believe that she is intellectually inferior or otherwise incapable. What purpose would propagating such a belief otherwise serve?

Actually, I'm not new to this forum.

I actually DO agree that many of the males here have negative views about females. Thing is, it is US who have to go out and meet YOU most of the time and that can be a very tough thing to do. Girls know this, and many use it to be pretty mean to guys. I've seen it in clubs: girls control those types of environments because they are not the chasers, they are the "Chasees" lol And they damn well know it lol

Females are not rapists as much as men. True. It doesn't take a 200lb man to sexually assault another person though. Most females who are sexual predators are those who molest children. Sometimes it's a teacher having sex with an 10 year old or a nanny molesting a 4 year old. Search the internet, cases of child abuse done by females is becoming more known as victims are less afraid of coming out. And I'm talking about the real sick shit, not sex with a 16 or 17 year old.

I love women and I am depressed that I can't meet them without having enormous amounts of anxiety. Without women, life would be DULL as HELL. My mind and biology are literally designed to enjoy the company of decent females.

Females have been oppressed in many societies for many years NO DOUBT. But that doesn't mean there should be some kind of "vengeance". I think it's called misplaced hate.

Bottom line: both genders have self image problems, but I have no problem admitting that it is more difficult for men. It's hard not to sound like I'm an asshole on this topic and I apologize if I am, but to me, it seems obvious.

 

[dark_horse]

Can I ask why? I am female and pretty solid because I had to learn to deal ... A lot of girls have self esteem issues , you know... That saddens me I don't know why they should be scared or feel unstable more. Girls are passive more because they are sort of like guys with mild SA. A lot of them are anyway. Even if they seem talkative there is always something they could be doing wrong because they are not cute enough....Too weird... Too perverted. Too intelligent.

It's madness. I'm p happy now that I'm really comfortable with myself. I think this all the time.

It really is more a self esteem issue than anything else. Feel inferior to strong personalities. Overpowered. I don't know... I usually attract the "damaged" types. I see at as my mission in life to help them to get back on their feet and make them better... Not the dominating type at all. I feel really exposed around loud, superconfident people..

Guess I just have to deal with it...

 

[Noca]

lol Yeah, if you walk into a lesbian club.

Even if women at a club are anti-male it's not your fault and doesn't make you a loser. I'm sure you're probably imagining that all the women there hostile. Is it possible that the majority of women hate men so much that it's palpable when you're in a room with them? What do you think the women are there for? Certainly not to pick up other women. ::

I think that a lot of hostility that women have towards men and men have towards women is because we really are just afraid of getting hurt or taken advantage of. Then we may have experiences which we think prove the things we've been taught. My mama taught me that all men are pigs who are out to get one thing only. When I happend to meet guys like this, it almost validated the things I have been taught but I eventually was able to make my own mind up and I've learned enough to know that what my mother taught me may apply to some men but not all.

The reason your "all men are pigs who are out to get one thing only" belief is validated all the time is probably because you seek out "bad boys" who are just that, pigs.

 

[Noca]

No, this belief is not validated because not all men are going to be this way. I don't judge men who are only out to get one thing in the first place and I don't see them as pigs. Now, rapists and child molestors are pigs but that's a different story. Are you saying that you know this to be true about me? The part about me seeking out bad boys?

I don't know it to be true, I said "probably" as in im making an educated guess about what you wrote thats all. No harm intended

As for pedos and rapists, yes they are disgusting human filth.

 

[dark_horse]

This men/women discussion will propably be going for many years to come. On many occassions I have seen people struggling with the same issues. By "people" I mean people from both genders, all races and backgrounds.

After all of this I still find women enchanting. Being single doesn't mean I don't love woman. The "not understanding them" part just adds to the mystical aspect.

 

[dark_horse]

I agree that everyone struggles at some point or in some way.

Your view is a new and interesting perspective. I hope that things won't be ruined for you once you do get to know women more.

I've had quite a number of failed relationships. The last one lasting 5 years. Even after the dissapointments and sleepless nights, I still fall in love at the drop of a hat. I love the feeling of being in love....

 

[google]

i need drugs