Introductions - whew, scary!

[snail]

I'm snail. If this is the right forum for me, then many of you can relate to the fact that my heart is beating hard at the thought that this post will be greeting with derision, suspicion, hatred, and possibly some sort of violence. What really humiliates me is that I make my living as a public performer - so I probably really don't belong here. While performing, my anxiety, fear and shyness grind to a halt because I feel some control of my environment. When the show's over, however, I want to sink into the ground, or, often, die. When not performing, my life is a sort of hell. I am unable to ever really be honest with anyone and feel great anxiety around everyone. I have a partner who I feel comfort with because she is a sort of mother figure, but I know that I am completely trapped in the relationship until one of us dies. I have done talk therapy and been on medication for about 10 years, but I feel like it only makes me more anxious because I know that all of my instincts are wrong. Well, that's all for now. Sounds sort of depression, but, then, that's why I'm here.

 

[Starry]

Hello Snail, welcome to SPW.

I'm sorry about all the anxiety you feel, but then all here can relate to that.

I'm also sorry about the depression. I hope the forum will help you.

Anyway, welcome.

 

[YankeeBob]

Welcome

You are not alone....there are others like you in the world.

If you think back to your childhood were you :

1) alone,

2) with few friends whom you could trust,

3) feeling hollow all the time

4) compared yourself with others and felt that something was missing?

If so ...it might be that you were suffering from "covert depression". That is an emptiness which went undiagnosed.

As we realise what might have been going on...we shift the "covert" to "overt" depression.

It is possible for some of us to work out why we feel hollow and tackle these issues one at a time ( unless we can multi task - which I can't do )

and then slowly find "ladders to get out of the hole of depression".

Take care. Be well.

 

[Boober]

Hi snail, I'm a newbie too! I suffer from severe SA but I'm a lead singer in a band! I get terribly nervous before I go on stage but once I'm up there I seem to be able to mask my fear. I hate it when I come off stage though, and people ask me questions - I go into the toilets and hide! It's nice to know that there are other SA sufferers who are in the entertainment trade too

 

[snail]

Hi snail, I'm a newbie too! I suffer from severe SA but I'm a lead singer in a band! I get terribly nervous before I go on stage but once I'm up there I seem to be able to mask my fear. I hate it when I come off stage though, and people ask me questions - I go into the toilets and hide! It's nice to know that there are other SA sufferers who are in the entertainment trade too

Ah Yes! Reading your post made me feel alot better! Thanks!!!