Intimidated by Male Professor

[LovelyAmor]

Ok..So i'm a sophomore in college. My major is Criminal Justice (lol) and I'm taking a Political Science class. I thought I really didn't need to visit sites like these again (i did in the past) and that I was ok because I had been doing Positive Affirmations. I have become more confident and my self-esteem has boosted. But I still find myself slipping into those anxious, self-conscious, paranoid moments.

When i'm in the class I try to look directly at him while he is speaking to show that I am interested and alert. I don't want to look down or play with my phone because that would be rude. I don't know if he can tell the nervousness in my eyes? I'm just so paranoid!! I think he notices it and is wondering "why does she keep looking at me?" "Why is she looking like that?" "what's wrong with her?". And I 'feel' that he gives me this look like he is tired of me and annoyed by it.

Sometimes I think I look a certain way but when I stop look in the mirror I notice that nothing is really wrong. Also I am a little intimidated by males, especially authority figures. I feel like i'm just crazy sometimes!

I don't want to drop the class just because of that. I really want to get over this crap. I was doing so well and i've just slipped back into it.::

 

[kc1980]

How many other students are in your class?

Does your professor seem to be angry or in a bad mood in general?

I have taught classes for a while in high school, and the issue of how to look at the students can also be a bit of a problem for a teacher. One should avoid always looking at the same person, while ignoring others.

 

[scoobycrawler]

okay my best advise to you and I am serious not joking really that if you look at his package and imagine his fly is down, see him and how embarrassed he must be since he is up there in front of all those young adults and you just can visualise him with his fly down teaching the entire class. problem solved.

 

[Minty]

I think he notices it and is wondering "why does she keep looking at me?"

If he thinks his students are weird for looking at him when he's giving lecture, he shouldn't be a teacher.

Maybe you could try writing notes so all of your attention goes into the lecture and summarizing it instead of the anxiety/paranoia you've got going on. He'll be pleased to see at least one of his students taking notes.

 

[bsebring]

Maybe he's noticing that you're staying alert and paying attention to his lectures. You said you're looking in his eyes when he speaks and staying alert. Maybe out of respect he's noting that you're listening by doing the same. I highly doubt he's thinking anything negative about you.

...it's better than him looking down or playing with his phone lol

 

[LovelyAmor]

How many other students are in your class?

Does your professor seem to be angry or in a bad mood in general?

I have taught classes for a while in high school, and the issue of how to look at the students can also be a bit of a problem for a teacher. One should avoid always looking at the same person, while ignoring others.

There are about 20-25 people in the class. That does not bother me though. I am A LOT more comfortable in classrooms than i used to be but it's just the issue with the eye contact and me thinking he is noticing that I might be nervous. I can brush it off one minute, and then the next minute I get paranoid again.

No, he always seems to be a in a pleasant mood. Maybe he is just emotionally detached and i'm interpreting his expressions/tone of voice and actions (every little thing) the wrong way?

Really, teachers/professors too? I'm always thinking, WHY am i thinking this way? It's so crazy. I can focus and be nervous/paranoid at the same time. I used to not be able to focus at all, so I guess that's a good thing lol.

 

[LovelyAmor]

okay my best advise to you and I am serious not joking really that if you look at his package and imagine his fly is down, see him and how embarrassed he must be since he is up there in front of all those young adults and you just can visualise him with his fly down teaching the entire class. problem solved.

LOL! I would feel a bit weird if I imagined that..

But thank's for the advice!

 

[LovelyAmor]

If he thinks his students are weird for looking at him when he's giving lecture, he shouldn't be a teacher.

Maybe you could try writing notes so all of your attention goes into the lecture and summarizing it instead of the anxiety/paranoia you've got going on. He'll be pleased to see at least one of his students taking notes.

Well I only write notes when he SPECIFICALLY mentions something from the book and that needs to be written down. Not just everything because sometimes he just talks to be "talking" lol. (if that makes sense) . He doesn't write on the board much. It's mostly a discussion in this class lol.

But ok i'll try to do that!

 

[LovelyAmor]

Maybe he's noticing that you're staying alert and paying attention to his lectures. You said you're looking in his eyes when he speaks and staying alert. Maybe out of respect he's noting that you're listening by doing the same. I highly doubt he's thinking anything negative about you.

...it's better than him looking down or playing with his phone lol

Maybe so...I think i'm just being too paranoid lol.

 

[LovelyAmor]

Well this class is not in a lecture hall. It is a normal class with about 25 people (like in high school, ugh). There are no power points or work to look at. He is just standing up there talking. I look at him for a while, but then I look in other directions (trying to pretend like i'm calm lol). I look at people and see what they are looking at and some are looking down, on their phones, or looking at him too. But I feel that when I look at him, I have a nervous/scared/insecure look on my face (and he notices it!). Thinking rationally/logically...this probably isn't true but I can't help but think that! Crazy right?

 

[Iseesky]

Maybe he's noticing that you're staying alert and paying attention to his lectures. You said you're looking in his eyes when he speaks and staying alert. Maybe out of respect he's noting that you're listening by doing the same. I highly doubt he's thinking anything negative about you.

...it's better than him looking down or playing with his phone lol

I agree with this. I've always had trouble with this in high school AND in college. Should I look at the teacher the entire time? Should I look at my notes/the board? What if they think I'm not paying attention/bored/uninterested?

Typically if YOU are interested in what the teacher has to say, they respond to that. It's like how the loud ones who always ask questions in class are the ones who the teachers remember. Similarly, the ones who make eye contact with the teacher will be the ones who the teacher looks at! They're not going to waste their time and yours by focusing on the kid in the corner texting. I doubt he can sense the paranoia on your face...I doubt it's even visible! Unless you're going around like this :: or he probably reads your face as a blank, normal expression.

Aaalso...If he was weirded out by his students looking at him the entire lecture, he'd provide notes and pictures for them to follow along with...Whether it be on the board or in an actual packet of notes and pictures provided beforehand.