in love....social phobia holding me back,help!!

[nicola_maire]

ok i need big time advice, on all levels, social phobia and 'normal'.
ok i started chattin to this lad online, he's 24, ive seen him on cam so i know he aint 60 or whatever,lol. we get on really well, and we find eachother attractive, he lives quite far away, he wanted to come to where i live to meet me, ii chickened out coz i got scared id be boring or whatever(social phobia kicks in) now im ok nwith all the social phobia stuff, and i do wanna meet him. but i still cant help thinking what the point is? he lives like 100 miles away from me, he's 24 im 17, i cant help thinking why is he interested in a 17 year old when he's good lookin and can get a nice girl his won age?
i guess im wounderin if there is a point?
does the age matter?
do you think my fears of meeting him r social phobia ones or r normal for any girl questioning a motive of an older, good looking man?
any advise would be wounderfull
nicola xxx

 

[Remus]

age dont matter, go for it!

 

[Chilling__Echo]

yeah, i agree. age doesn't matter but i recomend you take a friend if you visit... you never know. but alot of people have met online so you might really have something there. be safe.

 

[SilverLiner]

It can work so long as you're safe. I agree about bringing a friend with you. If he's really interested then he'll appreciate your concern and safety.

 

[nicola_maire]

even if he comes to where i live n i meet him in a public place? i feel abit rude if hrs traveled 100 miles o c my mate.....but thx for the support

 

[Cryptolysergick]

Ive planned to visit a girl, never happened, but you are aswesome if you are willing to visit him. I say go for it.

 

[Yossarian]

even if he comes to where i live n i meet him in a public place? i feel abit rude if hrs traveled 100 miles o c my mate.....but thx for the support

Yes, if he is worth his salt he will understand.

I think you are wise to ask questions. Be careful. Not just about the physical danger side but the emotional side too. Take your time. Don't be pressured or guilt tripped into anything you don't feel comfortable with.

As silverliner said, he will understand. If he is a decent guy. I can imagine how scary it must be meeting someone you like for the first time. I hope it works out for you. It has done for alot of people.

 

[FruitLooPs]

100 miles is nothing. thoughtless...lots of people meet people online...its not fishy its actually very normal. better online over a long period of time than taking some drunk dude home when youve had too much in a club.

yeah, thats a workable distance. My brother had a long distance relationship with someone he met online. He flew up to her see quite alot and it worked out fine.

I can imagine myself in 5 years time in that situation, and I wouldn't consider myself unattractive. Online dating is pretty socially acceptable these days, you can find plenty of attractive and non dodge people out there.

Still keep your wits about you and it should work out fine.

 

[emmie]

im in this very same situation!!!! only my social phobia is stopping me more than the worry of who he is. (my mum has warned me hes probably a rapist etc) but if i was to go and meet the man who i like a lot i would take a friend.

 

[nicola_maire]

yeh my mates said they's stay in the back round, like pretand they dont know me etc, so if it does go wrong their there. and i can relate to the fact he is 24 n it does sound abit hmm, but when i said i didnt wanna meet him, he dropped it, which if he really wanted to rape me, he would nag abit, but he said it was ok. i know he find me attractive, he gets excited when i have new pictures, im quite goodlooking, i didnt mean to meet anyone online but you cant help it when you meet some one, virtualy or reality, liking them. i dont even know if ill do it or not, not till i know he's serious, i dont wanna meet someone who's gonna waste my time. its a shame our preceptions r abit distorted through sp, but your still in there, and sometimes you need to trust your gut. you never know if things work out, sacrifices could be made. im gettin to far ahead,lol. but u never know ay