Scottish_Player
Well-known member
"I am only happy when I am sad"
I read that somewhere once and it applied to me so much. For me when I am sad I feel happy but not happy as in smiling happy more of a contented happy. Its like I know the feeling I am feeling is real for once and I don’t have to pretend no more. Everyday I feel like I am pretending or just acting out a role I have to play. I go to work and play my part and then I can come home and be my happy sad self again. it’s a mixed up feeling a bit like my loneliness feeling, I have so many people around me yet I still feel lonely because there is no one in my life that I truly feel close to or that I could confined in and having to keep all this stuff to myself really doesn’t make things any easier but at the same time I don’t want to find that someone that I can confine in and end up scaring them away with all my problems and complications. Its hard to describe but I just know there is something missing from my life like there is a gap that needs to be filled but I just don’t know what it is I need to fill it with. Well maybe I think I know what it is but I am not sure? I think it is love that is missing from my life but until I find love I will not know if this is what I am missing. :roll:
I read that somewhere once and it applied to me so much. For me when I am sad I feel happy but not happy as in smiling happy more of a contented happy. Its like I know the feeling I am feeling is real for once and I don’t have to pretend no more. Everyday I feel like I am pretending or just acting out a role I have to play. I go to work and play my part and then I can come home and be my happy sad self again. it’s a mixed up feeling a bit like my loneliness feeling, I have so many people around me yet I still feel lonely because there is no one in my life that I truly feel close to or that I could confined in and having to keep all this stuff to myself really doesn’t make things any easier but at the same time I don’t want to find that someone that I can confine in and end up scaring them away with all my problems and complications. Its hard to describe but I just know there is something missing from my life like there is a gap that needs to be filled but I just don’t know what it is I need to fill it with. Well maybe I think I know what it is but I am not sure? I think it is love that is missing from my life but until I find love I will not know if this is what I am missing. :roll: