I need some help here;inquiries

[andy316]

Hello guys,

I understand some here might have the same problems here,but all I want to know is why we have it or has anyone figured this out?I am meeting a counselor tomorrow,and I wanna explain as good as I can.

All my life I have been overprotected by my sh*thole mom and an abusive dad who never even wanted me in the beginning.I was bullied a lot at school,and turmoil at home was taking a toll on me.

I am at a small college now,and I am having a hard time making friends.I am being extremely open,as social as possible,talking as much as I can,but it still doesn't work.The people I try to make friends with later on stop talking or just starting picking on me.Worse when one starts,the other just keeps on going.Its like some people just hate me and not even want to be around me.I cannot for the love of god connect like some people can.

Can anyone please explain why is this happening even when I am being as open as possible?Is my past ever gonna let me live peacefully?

 

[mart22n]

Hi,

What I would do in this case: when you're being alone with one of your classmates, just you and him, ask them openly, why would they act towards you this way? If you're honest about it, you could get an honest answer. You just might be doing something wrong without even knowing about it. Observe, ask, discuss, learn GL with the shrink!

 

[Rainbow Brite]

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[andy316]

It is not you, it is just them and how other people naturally perceive people in your situation; especially sense they do not experience the same problems as you and can not possible relate to you in anyways possible. You first need to understand and take into account that these people bothering you in college are most likely not aware of your problem, nor know your motives for talking in the approach that you are, in order to gain friendship and maintain a conversation.

As for your parents, pretty much the same applies, they simply do not know how you feel, thus they can not relate and continue to treat you the way they do.

The problem simply is, most people can not naturally relate to you because it is impossible for them to understand your problem and they do not understand why you try to be so social, because they do not get that your motives are simply to make friends by talking in the way that you do, thus they continue to bother you which is not right, especially for college; but it is how things come naturally, sadly.

What does this all means? This means that you are a unique individual who is not well understood by the majority, thus they continue to bother you and fail to see what your motives are and the fact that they can not figure out why you talk so much and continue to bother you, well it simply proves that they do not know what your motives are and what you wish to accomplish, which is simply being social and having friends, among other things.

You appear to be a marvelous person, who is going through difficult challenges, I wish you the best of luck.

What a great post!!Thank you so much for the honesty.I am sure you had a similar situation like mine?

The thing is,talking too much might make me look dumb,or talking all sorts of sh*t might make me look even more dumb,I dunnr maybe I am still socially not ready.Or just like you said,trying to hard.

I just do not understand for the love of god how they could easily connect while I can't.One of them talk with me in all sorts of weird/funny way,only to make fun of me in the process.You know when you feel they will never talk to you about good/personal stuff but rather stupid things and just leave you or ignore anything you say to contribute to the conversation.

 

[Rainbow Brite]

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