i need some advice

[qwerty123]

Hi
I don't have ocd, but my best friend does. i met her in a psychiatric ward about a year ago.
we both used to go a program for teenagers with mental illnesses.
my friend turned 18 a few months ago, and you have to be under 18 to attend the program (I'm 15).
i am worried because she told me that she hasn't left her house for over a month. she only leaves her room for half an hour each day to use the bathroom and have a shower. she spends all her time watching tv, playing video games and making sure nothing touches her.
her mom does everything for her, she cooks, opens doors for her, washes her clothes, cleans her room, buys her antibacterial wipes (which she uses constantly), rubber gloves (she wears five gloves on each hand whenever she has to touch something), and other cleaning things. she is completely dependent on her mom.
i think this is very unhealthy for her
and she's no letting anyone visit her anymore.
as her best friend i feel i should do something, but i don't know what to do.
any advice?

 

[slimjim119]

I would start by talking to your best friend's mother and explain what an unhealthy situation your friend is in. OCD like any affliction will never get better if you keep feeding into to it. You have to break the cycle and face the real world. Talking to a professional is one of the first important steps.

If your friend wants to have any type of normal life, now is the time to act. If her mother keeps assisting with her habits, that would be almost impossible.

 

[Ocdforthelose]

I'd talk to her mom about your concerns first, and then maybe it would be a good idea to get your friend on these forums since all she does is stay in and play video games anyway. She needs to see that other people are also dealing with this and it is no excuse to stay home and not really try to get better. I have been in the stay at home all the time rut before, due to SA and OCD. My mom has also tried to help me a little by doing a lot of the cleaning but I refuse any help other than the most disgusting jobs at this point. My staying home all the time didn't help me a whole lot but I started working my way out of it by coming up with an "at least" policy... Like a goal to at least work at home for example, instead of sitting around being miserable. The video games thing makes it sound like your friend isn't even trying for an at home job or online college courses or anything, possibly thinking that her mom will always be there to take care of her and she doesn't need to at least try to get better. Meds and therapy wouldn't hurt either, and if she's unwilling to do that, she may have to hit rock bottom first, before she says "enough of this" and gets some help.
Still, I think getting her to go online and communicating with others with OCD will convince her that it's something she can deal with (without her mom) with effort, and that most of us can get to the point where we can eventually live somewhat normal lives.

I sound like I have a life here, doesn't it? Not really..I'm still pretty screwed up too but convinced I can get better, and so I try.

 

[Danfalc]

I sorta agree with what slimjim is saying.Tho im not sure approaching your friends mum and pointing out its unhealthy as such would be a good idea... she likley knows.

Its such a hard situation... its likley her parents arnt allowing people to visit because they feel she is too ill at the moment or there worried how people will react.. which is totaly understandable.But its obvious your a good friend and she needs one right now

If you cant visit kee in touch alot... just ring up to let her know you care,you might not be able to cure all her problems but just knowing someone cares can help.Maybe once you gain the trust of her mum a little she will let you visit.And just be there for her.Best of luck