I just don't get it

[c03fordstang]

I have an issue...and I'm not sure how to fix it - I have been miserable for about 3 years now (i'm 25) I just find no joy in anything, I don't even like to go out anymore bc i just assume everything will end badly and nothing good will happen - I wake up in the morning, miserable, tread to work, float through the first 2 or 3 hours...start talking to people on AIM and thorugh ntexts...and feel more alive, and feel like "hey, im gonna go out tonight." I even make plans to go to movies...or tell girls i will call them later...and then...on my drive home from work...i just dont wanna do anything...i wanna sit home and watch tv, alone..and not put myslef in any kind of social situation at all...and the cycle repeats almost every day...

 

[A-UK-Lovely]

can i ask wether u have social phobia? coz it seems like you want to go with ur friends in the evening, but almost cant be bothered? like u feel effortless and just wanna sit and stare at a wall? i feel like that sometimes, where i just think ew i just wanna go into my cave for the evening. but its not normal to feel like that all the time hun.
what u need to do mate, i as much as maybe you dont want to, is follow through with ur plans, just go! even if u really cant be arsed etc. the best nights out ive had is when i feel miserable, dont wanna go out. but i force myself out, and it sorta snapps me out of being miserable and im alright again! and i think what was my problem? lol
but yeh, just go out. and keep doing it. i mean there wil be times u just dont wanna go out, and thats fine and normal. but if u know u do wanna go out, but just cant be bothered, just do it!

 

[c03fordstang]

i think you got it right ....I mean, I havent been diagnosed with anything...I started taking Zoloft like 6 months ago...and i take valium or xanax from time to time...but the cave for the evening line is perfect...but its not like i sit and stare at the walls...I talk online, I watch movies, I play online poker...It's almost as though I convince myself that theres no point in going out bc nothing will come of it.....

 

[A-UK-Lovely]

oh no, the stare at walls werent literaly stare at walls, more confined between 4 walls.
the same happens to me if i have no job. im on summer holidays atm. and i had a temp job until about a month ago? after 2 weeks of being skint and house bound, when i did go out..i wanted to go back home again, i just didnt like it! and usualy i hate bein indoors! wierd huh?

the best explaination i have for overcomming it is that your comfort zone, where u feel u relax is at home say in your bedroom right? well people that spend alot of time out, have comfort zones too, but theres might be having a few drinks down the pub with their mates, exact same thing, except there cave is socialising in a pub, and yours is on your own at home. if you want to feel more comfortable out and about, then you need to take every oppurtunity to go out, and expose yourself until being out and about is how u unwind! so u thinking man i wanna chil out, see if jim wants to go down pub after work.

hope that makes some kinda sense to ya?

 

[c03fordstang]

yepp...it does...and believe me, I tell myself that alot...but I just cant bring myself to actually going through with it....Even when I tell my friends to call me, and I see the phone going off, and KNOW they are calling to pick me up and go out for a little...I just ignore it, and tell them I fell asleep the next day...

 

[A-UK-Lovely]

i dnt know what to suggest then mate. u can either fight it all the way, or just accept it, which is all any of us can do in any life situation. good luck tho, u seem as if you heads in the right place. xx