i cant handle relationships

[MariahCarey]

its so hard to maintain a relationship with someone especially wiv sp. and i'd feel like if i ever had a bf and told him about my sp i'd be a burden 2 him and i'd bore him eventually n he'd probally leave me for sum1 more fun without a problem in the world. and then its the whole visitin them and meetin to go out on "dates" or woteva. i mean i get offers from guys and i get guys flirtin with me but i just dont know what to do and i've never been in a relationship b4 but i dont want to end up an old lonely lady livin alone with her 8 cats. i want to experience being wiv boys and stuff but my mind just turns to slush around them and theres just so many awkward moments cos i get so embarrased and shy. does any1 else feel like this and if u have a bf or gf how have u managed to maintain a happy relationship wiv ur sp?

 

[IceLad]

Never having been in a relationship really bothers me. To me, its a complete mystery how many other social phobic people seem to get a gf or bf in the first place.

At 26, I'm starting to believe that I'll never get into a relationship, even my family are starting to think that (though they think its through my own choice!)

 

[Cark]

I'm a guy who's 25 at the end of this month and I'm almost 3 months into my first relationship now. I also never believed it would be possible for me to function in a relationship - I mean, I could not even visualise it. It really did happen when I least expected it though. I think that you've got to make peace with yourself and learn to love yourself a little first and I know that sounds corny, but if you can't see any positive qualities... you can't expect anyone else too. Most of us have a negative side too, Nobodies perfect, but i think you have to really try and focus on the good in life and minimize the bad. I don't mean pretending to be happy, but finding things to be happy about. Above all, I think you gotta enjoy what you have... however crap it is and find positive things to focus on in the short term, like exercise or weight training. Any small way you can boost your self esteem, either by taking pride in your appearance, or taking up new interests that you can really get stuck into, reflect well with other people. I mean, if you don't make a bit of a noise, even if it's only in an internet forum, no one will no you are there. I think honesty is important too. I was totally upfront about who and how I was, to the point of brutal honesty, and the girl of my dreams responded to that .... and she obviousy understood a little to respond to that. Just don't give up. We met on myspace lol.... then yahoo... then real life. Ha ha, the ends justifies the means, and you have the potential to meet your match right here.... just don't get too obsessed with someone untill you meet them in person early on, so as to avoid getting hurt, and be safe girls... there are some real rando's out there, including me ;-)

 

[jayfan]

im sure many ppl in this forum can relate to where your coming from . i know i can . ive had one relationship that lasted about 1 month - and i was dumped because i was called "a boring " person . i dont think im a boring person though . 8) . . we would hang out and i just couldnt talk at all- i never did want to go out either .
so yup , obviously its extremely difficult .

 

[scatmantom]

I can, Im single and cant see that changing in the short term, but I think that someday it will. Or at least i HOPE that it will!

 

[Septor]

It also bother me that I was never in a relationship ever.It seem the older you get the harder it is to get in to one and the harder it is to keep up hope.Hell I don't think I will ever be in a relationship but I have to leave the possibility open otherwise I destroy any possibility of it happening at all.

I think the best thing we can do is not to dwell on it and let it take over our life.The worse thing you can do is become bitter over it.Like someone else said it can happen when you least expect it to.Meanwhile just live your life.Always try do something to improve your self in small ways.Just leave the possibility open and it might happen.

Sometime I think this whole relationship thing has more to do with dumb luck more then anything else.

 

[KyBoshia]

I am okay one-on-one and I have met most people online. Like not strangers, but I know them through friends or such and get to know the other person through chatting online seems to really help break the ice and be able to no be scared around them. It is really hard at first, but it gets better with time. I love being in a relationship, although I think I do tend to be a huge burden on the other person because I am so afraid of doing stuff alone (like going somewhere where there's strangers all around is too scary when alone for me). So, I do tend to rely on that person a lot. I just get really badly depressed when not in a relationship because it just makes it so hard to try to do things.