I can't get groceries or get gas without my husband!!!

needhelp

New member
I am a mother of a child with adhd. Her behavior is right out of control and we are having a hard time getting a diagnosis because her father (my ex husband) is working against us. I have always had social difficulties. When I was married the first time, I started having panic attacks in public and being much more social phobic because my husband was very verbally abusive and tried to say that everyone was talking about me and judging me etc.

I haven't had a panic attack in a couple of years and have been able to still go in public and I do feel panicky but I get over it and am ok. However with all the stress in my life I just can't deal with being in public. For one thing I feel like people are judging me, but lately I KNOW they are because of my daughters behavior. Now even when I am not with her, I can't go in public or face strangers. Today my husband asked me to get gas and I refused. I am so scared of having another panic attack, and I just feel like I can't talk to someone I don't know.

My panic attack happened after I paid for something and had to borrow twenty cents from my eight year old daughter. I overreacted and almost ran to the car and got there and couldn't breathe. We were parked where other cars driving by could see me and I just couldn't handle it that they might see me and wonder what was wrong.

I am going in public tonight to a meeting and my daughter is coming and I am so nervous I feel like crying. I went to the dr today about my daughter, but I had to have my husband with me. I feel like I can't speak up because everyone including the Drs are judging me.

What doesn't help, is that my ex husband is still telling me I am a terrible parent and talking to the teachers and my daughters psychiatrist and telling them that nothing is wrong with my daughter and she behaves perfectly for him. I know that is not true because he has admitted to her bad behavior and she tells me about it too.

I am scared to go to the Dr because I am afraid that because I was just there about my daughter, she will think I am trying to make up stuff, or exaggerate.
 

Azahara

Well-known member
I understand you

A difficult life! :cry:
I don´t understand the problem of your child (I´m not English-speaker) but It seems something like he/she loose her/him control.
Wen there´s a relative in the family who has a problem, all the family, specially parents are affected as well.
If I could understand well your ex- husband has been behaviouring very bad with you, so you have develop a dependence relation on him.

Without any doubt I would go to the doctor and even go an assossiation for battered women.
Good luck!
 

needhelp

New member
No I am not dependant on the ex husband, I am dependent on my new husband. I was just saying that the ex made me more social phobic.
Thanks for your reply. It is very hard on the whole family.
Stassy
 

CheshireCat

Member
Wow I'm sorry to hear about your situation. It is terrible that your ex-husband acted/acts that way to you, but just be glad he is your ex, you don't need that. How is your current husband? Is he supportive of you and your fear of the public?
 

needhelp

New member
My new husband is awesome. He supports me although he doesn't understand it. To him it isn't logical. He also supports me in trying to get my daughter help. It is wonderful.
 
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