I am confused..What kind of fear I do have?

pathfinderx

New member
Hey I am a newbie here.Just joined!

Well...no surprice like you,i am also a social phobiac.I wanna share with you some stuffs guys.Hope I will get some peace!

The other day one of my cousins came home to visit me.After having lunch we thought to go out to spend some time with each other and chit chat.Suddenly I became so anxious.From nowhere my face muscles started twiching, literally my lips (which always happens to me when i am socialy nervous.i wont be able to give right expressions in my face when i have that i know.i dont want anyone to notice that as it is so embarassing).My fear was someone in the city will pop in and I would need to introduced him/her to my cousin whom he(my cousin) has never met.I started shaking mildly i knew.But I could manage it for awhile.We smoked a cigrette together even I know the fact that my hands will trumble when i do.We were about to leave the place.I didnt want anyone to see us and I desperately wanted to leave that place.Suddenly one of my friends came.I wanted to introduce him to my cousin.My heart started pounding so fast.My face muscle started twiching and lips were almost shaking.Somehow I could manage to tell my friend he is my cousin and he came to vist me.I don't know if they notice my nervousness or not.But I was feeling an owerwhelming fear in my mind something bad will happen and my anxiety will come out infront of them and i won't be able to speak behave well i will shake etc. etc. But i didn't know one thing that why i scared why i am anxious in these kind of situation.I never knew and i never know.Later we three of us lighted a cigrette again.My hands were shaking.I hope to god they wont notice that.Eventually we left the place both of them didn't ask anything about it.I was afraid they would ask me why I am so nervous but they didn't.But I have been feeling they noticed my anxiety and they might have judged me i am a phobiac and a shy guy.I feel so ashamed.I am afraid to go out now.I am shy to meet my friend now.I stay home even if he calls to me to go out.I feel humiliated in front of them.I always wanted yo be a good guy in the friend circle even if i have a very few of them.But its always happening this kind of fear draws me back.i dont want to be a nervous wreck.I want to be a superhero.I know I am a very handaome guy.People always say this to me and girls are behind me.but no worth.i cant enjoy.i am phobiac.i want to live a normal life.

What to do,Do you guys feel the same like i said above? How do i overcome this dilemma.I want to be a normal guy in the frienda group.They all are nomal,They have friends.I meet them.But I cant.Y

Ps: Sorry my English is bad.Please forgive me.I hope you got the message!!!

I am a 28 year old guy.Single!
 
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