How do you help someone who doesnt want to be helped

[KiaKaha]

Sometimes people Instant message me, and I get talking to them, I ask them how they are, which usually leads to what is troubling them. Recently though, there is a user on here, who despite my best efforts, simply did not want any kind of help...even though she was obviously distraught. I realized that there was only so much I could say or do, but It didnt make any difference, so I thought I would just listen, instead of "helping" them.

The reason I am making a thread about it though, is because I could tell that the person was feeling hopeless, and there was mention of suicide. So now I am concerned for this persons safety. Should I tell one of the admins on here? or what...?

For obvious reasons I cant tell you who it is...

 

[ありがとう]

I think you did all you can really... There's a limit to how one can help through the internet. If one isn't willing to accept your help, then it's their own problem (as it seems like they came on here for help)... I don't know if telling an admin will help, but you could give it a try.

 

[mrb]

mate there is only so much you can do ? just listen try to help , give advice , but in the end its up to them if they listen or not , i hope who ever it is seeks your advice and trys to get help ...... its a hard site were on people get down , and sometimes talk about suicide .... all you can do is listen to there problems and be a freind ... past that its up to them ...

 

[Ignace]

Agree with Anrox, you can't force somebody. You can tell her that you are ready to help her and willing to listen to her and everything she wants. In hope she'll come to u for help.

 

[KiaKaha]

Yeah your right mrb, I was all good up to the point where she mentioned suicide, alarm bells went off. I know she is still about though because I can see when she is online. So I guess there is still hope, I said she could message me (or anyone else if things get really bad) because I am sure that no one here wants to see other users hurt themselves beyond the point of no return.

 

[mrb]

this site is to share problems mate , hope she long term is ok , as i said we all get down , and need someone to talk to

 

[Inspiration]

Nothing. If one have made up their mind... no matter how hard you try to talk some sense into it... it just bounce off deaf ear. In SPW, we try to help other as much as we can. No matter how hopeless life seem to be... taking one own life is just not the wisest choice. There are time... i think about suicide.And this world is just too cruel and unbearable. Would i be happy if i have kill myself? Will my problem go away? It doesn't. Instead, I have just killed my only hope of ever fixing my problem by killing myself. We maybe lose countless battle but there is still hope. The war is not over.

 

[SilverFire]

Nothing. If one have made up their mind... no matter how hard you try to talk some sense into it... it just bounce off deaf ear. In SPW, we try to help other as much as we can. No matter how hopeless life seem to be... taking one own life is just not the wisest choice. There are time... i think about suicide.And this world is just too cruel and unbearable. Would i be happy if i have kill myself? Will my problem go away? It doesn't. Instead, I have just killed my only hope of ever fixing my problem by killing myself. We maybe lose countless battle but there is still hope. The war is not over.

One of the only things that kept me from killing myself back when I really struggled with it was the EFFECT it would have on other people. Sure, I could be brave and say, "I don't care what my parents think, or how it affects my brothers," but I knew I couldn't get away from that. I knew although my pain would be over, I'd be giving them a pain that would go on for years. I just couldn't be that cruel, even if I cared nothing about myself.

 

[MsKitty]

in my experience those that say they dont need help are usually the one who need the most help ...

 

[AnxietyDave]

In order to be helped, one first needs to be willing to do what is necessary to help yourself. You can never take responsibility for the actions of another person, only your own. Being willing to offer your support is about as much as you or anyone else can do the rest is for the other party to accept your offer, but you can never be responsible for their decisions or actions.