Highschool Anxiety

[IrishRampage]

I hope this thread doesn't make me sound like a whining kid, but I'll try my best anyway haha. Welp, here's the deal, I'm nearly 17, with social anxiety and there usually comes a time once or twice a week where everything that's going on in school piles up in my mind and I end up staying home. When I say "everything" I mean things like socializing with new people and girls, homework, teachers freaking out at me, what others will think of me, being ashamed of my marks compared to others, and the list goes on. Whenever I end up staying home due to all these things, I'm always overwhelmed with guilt as well, because I know that my friends have to go through this stuff too, but you dont see them taking a day off. Also when my parents start texting me and start to get angry, I dunno I just feel so ashamed. Now that I think about it it must be a lot easier for everyone else at school cause they don't have to deal with SA, yet the teachers still bitch when I don't show up. How would they know how this feels? This all just seems unfair

 

[IrishRampage]

Anyone else face this problem? Maybe have some tips on your high school experiences? It would be great for any advice

 

[Azael]

For a while I used to do this. There was one year in particular. I took advantage of my insomnia to by at least one day off most weeks. I would be so worn down from the anxiety and lack of sleep that I was a wreck anyway. It actually made things worse, much much worse. When you stay away from school whilst suffering these problems, it's very difficult to reintegrate yourself again. It was bad enough going back on a Monday, but most of the week off? That's far too much in my opinion. You mention your grades suffering, this no doubt a result from gaps in your knowledge. The handywork of your absence! My advise is to realise that you are not primarily there to please anyone. It really doesn't matter what your relationship with these people is like. Once you move on, you will never see most of them ever again, if any at all! If you have any reason to bite the bullet and improve your attendance, it's your education. You are setting yourself up for a big fall otherwise. I am not trying to take a hardline stance here out of meaness. I just don't want you to repeat the mistakes I made. It took me a long time to rectify some of them, others I still pay the price for for now... twelve years later! During that year I mentioned, I was between friends too, so was not fully apart of either group and found myself alone many a day. I understand how uncomfortable and heartwrenching it can be.

 

[IrishRampage]

Hey Azael, thanks for the advice. There are times I also think I am taking advantage of being able to skip, whenever I do I know very well that I've missed out on a lot of notes. I may tell myself that I'll ask some classmates on what they learned, but I'm way to nervous to do that.

Aside from all of these anxieties and worries, I'm just not feeling inspired or motivated at all. It's just the same routine every single day. Walk the halls anxiously and hope no one says anything to me, hang around my friends who don't really talk to me anymore, try to gain the confidence to talk to this girl. Honestly its all a real mess, and it isn't just with school either. I'm not really motivated at all anymore, nothing excites me. I always wonder if kids my age are eager to socialize, because in my eyes I never look forward to it

 

[Azael]

Hey Azael, thanks for the advice. There are times I also think I am taking advantage of being able to skip, whenever I do I know very well that I've missed out on a lot of notes. I may tell myself that I'll ask some classmates on what they learned, but I'm way to nervous to do that.

Aside from all of these anxieties and worries, I'm just not feeling inspired or motivated at all. It's just the same routine every single day. Walk the halls anxiously and hope no one says anything to me, hang around my friends who don't really talk to me anymore, try to gain the confidence to talk to this girl. Honestly its all a real mess, and it isn't just with school either. I'm not really motivated at all anymore, nothing excites me. I always wonder if kids my age are eager to socialize, because in my eyes I never look forward to it

http://britamerican.org/download/library/Motivation.pdf
http://www.lmi-inc.com/Articles/MotivateYourself.pdf
Self-Motivation - How Self-Motivated Are You? - Goal Setting Tools from MindTools.com

The site mindtools is very useful overall. I'd recommend exploring it for ideas and fresh new perspectives. I hope this at least offers something to get you thinking.