Hiding social anxiety

[PhantomPod]

The only time I'm not good at hiding my SA is when my face betrays me and I go red. But other than that, I think I hide it very well. Which worries me, because then I get all paranoid that people will think I am a snob if I don't talk to them. Like, I don't act all outgoing and talkative and everything, but I do have good eye contact, which might give people the vibe that I am nt shy, so then when I don't talk much I am worried that they will think I am just being rude.

Like, when I go into work in the morning, I don't say hi or good morning to my coworkers because I'm too shy. So then I sit there at my desk worrying that now they think I'm a big jerk who just ignored them.

But, yeah, I think I hide my SA fairly well.

 

[Schmoo]

I get all paranoid that people will think I am a snob if I don't talk to them. Like, I don't act all outgoing and talkative and everything, but I do have good eye contact, which might give people the vibe that I am nt shy, so then when I don't talk much I am worried that they will think I am just being rude.

Like, when I go into work in the morning, I don't say hi or good morning to my coworkers because I'm too shy. So then I sit there at my desk worrying that now they think I'm a big jerk who just ignored them.

Ditto this. I think I come off inadvertently as being a bitch b/c of my shyness. For some reason, it's awkward and terrifying just to say hi (have a stop and chat) or goodbye, and it's just easier not to. But then I imagine if someone comes in and doesn't greet me, I would probably think that person either doesn't like me or is in a bad mood. Oi.

 

[Rigil]

Absolutely.

I'm adept at hiding it, and there's no conscious effort.
I also hear "I can't believe you were so calm." the times I have to deal with something commonly stressful to everyone.
When I was 18, I got into the back seat of a car, and placed my hand on the pillar.
This allowed the front door to close on it.
I was actually telling people, "My hand is in the door." with a calm, monotone voice that conveyed no stress what so ever.
Inside, I was in great pain, and terrified of being ridiculed, and actually fought the desire to simply wait until the trip was over.
There's far more recent examples, but that's the one I find amusing.
I guess I've spent so much time in my life hiding my stress, that it's become second nature.
If only life happened in small, encapsulated experiences like these...

 

[Ruby6]

I Hide It, Too

In baffles me how well I hide my anxiety. It makes me feel like I'm living a lie- like a giant phony.

Two years ago, I became an agoraphobic. It was after a health crisis. I'm so mad at myself, for being this way! I used to work in a visible position, enjoyed community theater as a performer, and had had a great social life, plus I miss volunteering tremendously. I am missing out on life. Every day I tell myself it will be different, but it is not.

My mother was an agoraphobic for decades, back in the 70's. She was not able to leave the house from the time I was 3 to the time I started college. I never wanted to be like her. Never as in deeply never, ever, ever. How does this happen, and how can I make it stop? Beating myself up mentally does no good, and no matter how hard I try...nothing. I can't take Paxil or Wellbutrin, or even Prozac - extreme reactions to each. I'm healthy, I'm smart, I'm funny - but I can't get past this one thing.

What should I do first, to change? What next? I'm open to any advice.

I really want to change. Any advice is welcomed. Thanks for reading. You're the first person I've told. I

t is amazing how we all hide this problem and keep getting away with it. "Amazing" in a sad way. What to do?

 

[Cyrax]

I can't hide my SA at all =/

 

[slimjim119]

Re: I Hide It, Too

In baffles me how well I hide my anxiety. It makes me feel like I'm living a lie- like a giant phony.

Two years ago, I became an agoraphobic. It was after a health crisis. I'm so mad at myself, for being this way! I used to work in a visible position, enjoyed community theater as a performer, and had had a great social life, plus I miss volunteering tremendously. I am missing out on life. Every day I tell myself it will be different, but it is not.

My mother was an agoraphobic for decades, back in the 70's. She was not able to leave the house from the time I was 3 to the time I started college. I never wanted to be like her. Never as in deeply never, ever, ever. How does this happen, and how can I make it stop? Beating myself up mentally does no good, and no matter how hard I try...nothing. I can't take Paxil or Wellbutrin, or even Prozac - extreme reactions to each. I'm healthy, I'm smart, I'm funny - but I can't get past this one thing.

What should I do first, to change? What next? I'm open to any advice.

I really want to change. Any advice is welcomed. Thanks for reading. You're the first person I've told. I

t is amazing how we all hide this problem and keep getting away with it. "Amazing" in a sad way. What to do?

Sorry about your situation. I am not agoraphobic but have had SA most of my life. Things that help me are positive thinking, therapy, and exercise. I try to stay away from medication.

 

[JonnyD]

i'm very very good at it. but i think most people are, because well to the rest of people we are just too shy or strange

actually i can't hide when i'm sad - i'm not necessarelly sad with SA, im not a sad person generally.

When i'm SAD everybody can tell, but like very sad - scraching depression... strange because i often don't show emotions