hmm, well obviously i'm no therapist, you'll have to wait for the professional :wink: BUT so far what i would gather is maybe all these days years whatever, you've just found a way to deal with SA when you didn't know that the disorder existed (but i don't know you, just guessing!). all those feelings were repressed. now that it's out in the open and you're seeing people about it, it's like you can't ignore it. now it's how to face it and come out of it the best you can. i'm also assuming that all this came about after you told your doc?
like i say, this is just a wild guess, i can imagine that you're probably under a lot of stress, i was when i was diagnosed, and stress can do buttloads to our bodies and minds. hang in there, things will turn up. welcome to the board.