help me please- can i get my life back?!!

[beauts]

hi
i am new to this forum, n have come to realise that i may have SA i thought that i just painfully shy but now i think that i may have SA as i tick all the boxes that are on the checklist. Can anyone help...it is ruining my life...like for instance it is a sat nite i shud b out partyin but now i'm in the house...
i have no friends as i find it almost impossible to talk in groups...
i feel like everyone is looking at me n when i do talk my voice is really low...i can hear but no one else can hear what i am sayin(if that makes sense)....
n lunch time/break time at school is awful as i feel that everyone is lookin at me- when there not n i cant wait til its over so that i dont have to talk to anyone

n i'm only 17 i want my life back at the mo i have none- i'm really lonely/isolated n i'm heading of uni in september!

please some one help
thanks beauts

 

[scatmantom]

hi beauts

Welcome to the forum

At school i used to have no social life really. At lunch I was OK, but it was social interaction outside of school that bothered me. I know Im a fun person to be around and that I am easy to get on with...but I just got ( and to an extent still do get) very anxious about going out.

When I came to university I had only had about 3 or 4 nights out drinking. That all changed at uni in the space of a week and Now i have a great social life. I think Uni will help you loads...because its like a fresh start. Nobody knows who you are or where you come from and u can jsut start from scratch

Hope that is helpful!

 

[beauts]

thanks but

hi
thanks for ur words of wisdom but at lunch im mute i feel like a lost paort that i shudnt b there n in group situations it is really bad n i have no friends wat so ever! its really getting me down!
beauts

 

[cptkoi]

I never fitted at school or uni for that matter and i tend to be quite quiet when i first enter a new social situation or an environment were there is a new group of people that I want to be part of.

I tend to work out who I most relate too and then approach them when they are less people around, start up a conversation or something.

Next time the group forms i am on talking terms with at least one of them and that makes things alot easier.

 

[afraz]

Hi,
To help you resolve your problem all you have to do is face you fears. It really works and was personally used by me when I was 15 years old, and thankfully it worked and produced results which I never thought possible. I really like this technique, because if I didnt use it - I wouldnt be where I am today - A leading psychologist (social).

Hope this helps!
Afraz Ahmad
www.lulu.com/afrazahmad

 

[over_the_weather]

I know exactly where you're coming from. I've got this really stubborn streak so i determine to do things (like work as an elf in the Santas grotto at Christmas!) because I can't stand the thought of SA controlling me, but when it comes to actually doing the things it makes me feel sick! But I've got this ridiculous sense of responsibility, so I do them anyway and feel worse and realise that I would have been better off staying at home and watching a movie, or reading a book, which I actually enjoy. For me, there's no point in facing my fears because I anaylse my actions afterwards and feel awful and sure I've made an eejit of myself. Aaaaah! I'm graduating from uni this year, so I'll have to go and get a proper job and the thought terrifies me.
xo