twinkleeyes
Member
Hi everyone,
My name is Kimberly I'm 18, I will be 19 on Saturday. I'm from Louisiana. I posted some stuff under a complaining thing but I probably should have posted it here. So if it's okay, I'll paste it here.
I really don't know where to start. I know the beginning, right? Yeah I have no idea where that is.
I've always been shy, but I think it's getting worse. When I was like 4 or so I'd run behind my mom when people tried to talk to me. When I was 12 my dad got sent to jail and I felt like I had to grow up then. I had just switched schools (junior high) I couldn't handle the transition and got put in a private school. I did well there for about a year then withdrew again. I wanted to be home schooled, no one would allow it, anyway I ended up dropping out of high school my 12th grade year because of social phobia which makes me feel like a bigger loser. I feel like I should have been able to push myself. But in 11th grade I had been put into the court system for truancy so when I turned 18 I wanted to drop out. Besides having social phobia I have a number of other things wrong with me polycystic ovarian syndrome (PCOS), fibromyalgia, bulging disks in my back, migraines, high blood pressure, the list goes on. I can't even remember most of it myself because I decided about a year ago I wanted to quit all of my meds so I did just that and quit going to the doctor. Well my body wouldn't stop hurting (fibromyaglia) so I decided to go back to my rheumatologist. He suggested I go back to therapy but I've never really been able to open up to them. I've always found it hard to open up to people even my family but when I'm willing to talk they don't listen. It makes me sick. It's like no one cares or they don't believe me. I used to get called crazy all of the time and at one time I started to believe it. I'm glad I found them forum because even though I'm new I know there are people out there who can relate to me. I don't know how I'm ever going to survive in life seriously. I have no real goals, I don't even know how to make a goal. The only thing I've ever dreamt of having is a family of my own but I have no idea how that's going to happen when I can't bring myself to leave the house most days.
Okay I hope that wasn't too much and I also hope none of you think less of me.
My name is Kimberly I'm 18, I will be 19 on Saturday. I'm from Louisiana. I posted some stuff under a complaining thing but I probably should have posted it here. So if it's okay, I'll paste it here.
I really don't know where to start. I know the beginning, right? Yeah I have no idea where that is.
I've always been shy, but I think it's getting worse. When I was like 4 or so I'd run behind my mom when people tried to talk to me. When I was 12 my dad got sent to jail and I felt like I had to grow up then. I had just switched schools (junior high) I couldn't handle the transition and got put in a private school. I did well there for about a year then withdrew again. I wanted to be home schooled, no one would allow it, anyway I ended up dropping out of high school my 12th grade year because of social phobia which makes me feel like a bigger loser. I feel like I should have been able to push myself. But in 11th grade I had been put into the court system for truancy so when I turned 18 I wanted to drop out. Besides having social phobia I have a number of other things wrong with me polycystic ovarian syndrome (PCOS), fibromyalgia, bulging disks in my back, migraines, high blood pressure, the list goes on. I can't even remember most of it myself because I decided about a year ago I wanted to quit all of my meds so I did just that and quit going to the doctor. Well my body wouldn't stop hurting (fibromyaglia) so I decided to go back to my rheumatologist. He suggested I go back to therapy but I've never really been able to open up to them. I've always found it hard to open up to people even my family but when I'm willing to talk they don't listen. It makes me sick. It's like no one cares or they don't believe me. I used to get called crazy all of the time and at one time I started to believe it. I'm glad I found them forum because even though I'm new I know there are people out there who can relate to me. I don't know how I'm ever going to survive in life seriously. I have no real goals, I don't even know how to make a goal. The only thing I've ever dreamt of having is a family of my own but I have no idea how that's going to happen when I can't bring myself to leave the house most days.
Okay I hope that wasn't too much and I also hope none of you think less of me.
