tallycounter
New member
I would like to invite you into my world briefly.
I am not one to talk about myself very much usually making a conscious effort not to but in this case I suppose I can.
I am fairly certain that every single person I have ever met has mentioned I am the weirdest person they know. Not weird in a creepy way or crazy just something they could not quite put their finger on. I appear totally normal and can act in a manner you would never think anything was going on inside my head. Since I was a child (25 now) I had always had slight obsessions or thoughts (along with an array of other things) I became so infatuated with Superman I thought I was superman and wore my costume under my school uniform for a year with fake glasses. I was obsessed with the weather and if it would rain on particular days due to being paranoid of floods. Now that you are getting the gist of my issues I will give you a brief rundown of a standard day I have.
I will count out particular event in date format. If I know I did something on a particular day let’s say playing guitar, I played a certain way on a Monday I would need to back date for a few months and figure out when I played similar every time to that point. So I go through every single day figuring out what I did each time I played and of the process is interrupted or I think I am not following it correctly I have to repeat it until I have figured it out.
I will also create tally counts with sub headings (usually using an acronym so no one knows) in my work diary and scatter them everywhere with dates so only I understand them. I do this to remember the times I mentioned above with the guitar playing. The issue is even though I have doesn’t this sometimes I will re-create the whole thing again.
When I drive to work I position my mirror in such a way that if I see light beaming through the part of my hair I have to fix it until it is seamless. I also tally these days and often pull my car over and figure out every single time light has gone through my part in the past month or so. Pretty much similar to the ritual cased above.
I always work out (in tally mode) when I washed my hair last before I actually wash my hair. I need to figure out a month or so prior.
When at work I go to the bathroom and look in the mirror if there are any imperfections with my face hair etc (I am not vein trust me) I need to go in counting tally mode again. Often I will return to my office and re-enact what I did in the bath room walking around the office as if it were a bathroom figuring out my movements.
I count most things in 3’s, I have a issues raising my eyebrows. I have to do it in 3’s then 3 lots of 3’s then 3 more to seal the deal. This comes and goes.
Lately I have been eating with tissues on my hands or plastic, sometimes even gloves.
I use my tally concept to work out conversations I have had with girlfriends, friends or family. I I felt I was mean I need to work out every time I was nice or mean within the past few months.
As a singer I also work out when I sang good last (tally) before I even practice. Even practicing I am very obsessive about everything needs to be perfect or I start a scale again.
Same with guitar as I stated above I actually perform that ritual constantly.
I also went through a period of counting hairs in a a computer journal, if I saw a hair or anything (my own) I would date it and write it in this lasted a year and I had an impressive dated collection of hairs. But it didn’t stop there. I had classes of hairs, long, short, medium and also densitys. I put them all in order and added them to my spreadsheet. My ex girlfriend found this and went crazy at me, this was the beginning of the end of us. Ahh well. Worked out for the best IMO.
So there you have it a “brief” explanation of how I live. Is this considered bad or normal OCD? No matter what anyone says there is OCD there. I cannot talk to friends because they are so self obsessed that when I bring it up they say “Oh, yeah I have this thing where I like everything straight” HAHA THAT IS NOT OCD, that is just ridiculous. If they even knew. No matter what is wrong with me I am sure they have something worse. You know those people, love them all but far out. They also tell me I just want to be crazy if I ever bring up the fact I am slightly different, I don’t mean different like I want to be I mean holy sh%@ you should see my work diary crazy.
Okay now I have vented feel free to comment.
Should I see somebody? I am not comfortable with doctors as I find they secretly couldn’t give a left testicle about patients anymore. All $$$. Feel free to prove me different I have seen a few way back and they were horrible just throw medication and give it a name.
I have also been told I resemble an Aspergers patient.
I am sure my abilities in counting and working things out could go to much better use.
Thanks for your time everyone.
I am not one to talk about myself very much usually making a conscious effort not to but in this case I suppose I can.
I am fairly certain that every single person I have ever met has mentioned I am the weirdest person they know. Not weird in a creepy way or crazy just something they could not quite put their finger on. I appear totally normal and can act in a manner you would never think anything was going on inside my head. Since I was a child (25 now) I had always had slight obsessions or thoughts (along with an array of other things) I became so infatuated with Superman I thought I was superman and wore my costume under my school uniform for a year with fake glasses. I was obsessed with the weather and if it would rain on particular days due to being paranoid of floods. Now that you are getting the gist of my issues I will give you a brief rundown of a standard day I have.
I will count out particular event in date format. If I know I did something on a particular day let’s say playing guitar, I played a certain way on a Monday I would need to back date for a few months and figure out when I played similar every time to that point. So I go through every single day figuring out what I did each time I played and of the process is interrupted or I think I am not following it correctly I have to repeat it until I have figured it out.
I will also create tally counts with sub headings (usually using an acronym so no one knows) in my work diary and scatter them everywhere with dates so only I understand them. I do this to remember the times I mentioned above with the guitar playing. The issue is even though I have doesn’t this sometimes I will re-create the whole thing again.
When I drive to work I position my mirror in such a way that if I see light beaming through the part of my hair I have to fix it until it is seamless. I also tally these days and often pull my car over and figure out every single time light has gone through my part in the past month or so. Pretty much similar to the ritual cased above.
I always work out (in tally mode) when I washed my hair last before I actually wash my hair. I need to figure out a month or so prior.
When at work I go to the bathroom and look in the mirror if there are any imperfections with my face hair etc (I am not vein trust me) I need to go in counting tally mode again. Often I will return to my office and re-enact what I did in the bath room walking around the office as if it were a bathroom figuring out my movements.
I count most things in 3’s, I have a issues raising my eyebrows. I have to do it in 3’s then 3 lots of 3’s then 3 more to seal the deal. This comes and goes.
Lately I have been eating with tissues on my hands or plastic, sometimes even gloves.
I use my tally concept to work out conversations I have had with girlfriends, friends or family. I I felt I was mean I need to work out every time I was nice or mean within the past few months.
As a singer I also work out when I sang good last (tally) before I even practice. Even practicing I am very obsessive about everything needs to be perfect or I start a scale again.
Same with guitar as I stated above I actually perform that ritual constantly.
I also went through a period of counting hairs in a a computer journal, if I saw a hair or anything (my own) I would date it and write it in this lasted a year and I had an impressive dated collection of hairs. But it didn’t stop there. I had classes of hairs, long, short, medium and also densitys. I put them all in order and added them to my spreadsheet. My ex girlfriend found this and went crazy at me, this was the beginning of the end of us. Ahh well. Worked out for the best IMO.
So there you have it a “brief” explanation of how I live. Is this considered bad or normal OCD? No matter what anyone says there is OCD there. I cannot talk to friends because they are so self obsessed that when I bring it up they say “Oh, yeah I have this thing where I like everything straight” HAHA THAT IS NOT OCD, that is just ridiculous. If they even knew. No matter what is wrong with me I am sure they have something worse. You know those people, love them all but far out. They also tell me I just want to be crazy if I ever bring up the fact I am slightly different, I don’t mean different like I want to be I mean holy sh%@ you should see my work diary crazy.
Okay now I have vented feel free to comment.
Should I see somebody? I am not comfortable with doctors as I find they secretly couldn’t give a left testicle about patients anymore. All $$$. Feel free to prove me different I have seen a few way back and they were horrible just throw medication and give it a name.
I have also been told I resemble an Aspergers patient.
I am sure my abilities in counting and working things out could go to much better use.
Thanks for your time everyone.
