Greetings. New user here.

[Mahoshen]

I haven't been to a doctor or therapist about this but I strongly believe I have a avoidant personality disorder. Ever since middle school, I've been developing a heightened fear of being judged and disliked. I'm 19 now, and it's gotten to the point where I haven't had a real friend in almost 3 years. I fear what people think of me and my self confidence is extremely low. Most of my time I spend in front of my computer, in my room. I don't know what to do, I don't know where to turn. I feel so alone, I feel like I'm always going to be alone. I feel like the world and all the people around me are growing and I'm standing still. I don't want it to be this way for the rest of my life but I can't bring myself to change because I'm afraid.

 

[sabbath92002]

Hi Mahoshen, welcome to SPW!

 

[Eledee]

Hi Mahoshen!

U aren't alone...I think you are at precisely the same point a lot of us have been at or are at currently.

Don't be so hard on yourself, you have made a positive step by joining our online community.

Welcome!

 

[Mahoshen]

Thank you so much. You have no idea how relieved I feel right now, being welcomed like that. Strange that even on the internet, I was terrified to post anything about myself.