Frusterated and depressed over "friends"

[HeadFace]

I can't even help it. My last "friend" is starting to disappoint me beyond belief.
One might tell me that I should change my expectations but trust me I had none to begin with. I just wanted someone to talk to, maybe for an hour a day or something. I'm lonely, right. And I have no one else to talk to about life. And I've been getting this vibe (maybe even for the passed month and a half) that she doesn't give a **** about me or my life. In fact we were talking to day about our summer and she litterally told me to "have fun being lonely while I'm having going insane "
It was the worst thing ever. I've never felt that miserable since my last "friend".

I just give up! I'm better at being lonely, I don't even like people anyway.

All the people I learn to trust stab me in the back. And in the heart. It hurts terribley bad when you try to trust someone and then they act like they don't care.

I just try everything. I put all my effort into it. Into not seeming clingy or creepy. Into being nice as possible and doing everything I can. Into comforting them and giving them what they need.

But in the end... I've been told I'm a ****ty friend. I've been told I care too much. I've been told that the other end doesnt give a **** about if I care or not. I've been told that I need to find other friends.

I just want to give up. I don't want to find new friends. I just want to move on.

 

[Vampayah88]

What a bitch of a "friend", she's no worth spending time with thats for sure. I know what you mean about those people, the more nice you are the more they act like they don't give a ****.
I wish I could find someone who's just as lonely as me. Everyone around me seems to have a ton of friends, go to parties, hang out. I only have one guy friend and I lie to him sometimes about going out with my "friends" and doing stuff so he doesnt know how pathetic I am.

 

[goldatom]

Hi, don't worry. We are there. We know how it feels so we won't behave like that.

 

[Kinetik]

Your expectation levels are way too high. You've got to be able to lower them in order to feel more satisfied. Try to shoot for a middle ground whereby you're perfectly content to spend time alone while seeing a friendly chat as a welcome addition to your life instead of a daily necessity. It's not really fair on this friend to feel that they have to talk to you with regularity or else you'll be mad. That's why you have to be looser around people. You can't control the reciprocity in a friendship - you can only give what you get and it's only once the other person starts giving more than you that you can start to say "well maybe this one's a keeper". So try to enjoy your own company more, and raise your standards a little next time you get close to someone. There's no point becoming emotionally attached unless they're willing to meet you at least halfway.