"Friends" using you

[Toad]

Another rant...

Sooo..basically, all this semester people have been coming to me for help on homework and such. I find this very annoying, because this is the only reason that some of them are "friends" with me, and it takes away a lot of my free time (of which i have very little anyways). Recently it has gotten rediculous...last night for example i helped 3 people from like 11 pm - 3 am (talk about procrastination...good thing i dont sleep much or i would've been more pissed than i am already) in 2 subjects.

I just wish people would leave me alone...if they have problems read the fucking chapter, that's how i learn it...but no...they just come to me and expect me to explain it to them and do their homework. I normally don't mind it if they just have a small misunderstanding or a specific question, but when people call me to work through the homework with them...without even looking at it first...that crosses the line.

Sometimes people even get pissed at me when i dont give a good enough explanation of something...I mean...fuck...i'm the person trying to help you dont get mad at me because you cant understand. My favorite is when people blame thier grades on me...i mean...obviously if you don't do good it is my fault...after all, i was the one who explained it to you.

It has gotten to the point that I finally just disconnect my phone...my roomate doesn't mind to much because he didn't enjoy phone calls at 2 am either. People still come down to my room for help though...oh well...what can you do?

 

[MissAloneAtLast]

Ok so you've disconnected the phone..excellent.

Next step: Bolt the door shut
Pull the curtains
Turn all the lights down
and
Hide out under your bed

Works for me

Or you could just say No to them :wink:

 

[socratic]

:idea:

 

[Toad]

Or you could just say No to them

Unfortunately that is an ability i lack. I can't stand people being mad at me, and refusing to help would make them mad at me.

One person that I help is my friend, and I do want to help him learn the stuff, and he tries to learn it rather than just copying what i have or making me do it for him. I know if i keep helping this person and refuse to help anyone else, I would get crap for it. I really shouldn't care what the other people say, but i do.

It can get to the point where you get a severe hate for people, then you start to hate yourself for not dealing with it

Yeah...it's kind of already to this point. I don't really like making excuses unless they are the truth, but I might start doing that and then hopefully they will find someone else to bother.

 

[Septor]

Toad anyone that would use you like that is not a friend.I know your not going to like to hear this but your going to have to put foot down sooner or later.You might be able to get away with it in the short term by avoiding the problem but in the long term it will just keep happening and become worse.I know it's easier said then done and it going to be really hard for you do do it but these people that use you don't deserve your help and you should not let there opinion affect you.Again easier said then done.Good luck man I hope it works out for you.