Foreign Nationals, a stepping stone to social confidence

[Vincent]

I live in a house with people from all over the world.

They are all students, and hail from Sudan, Bangladesh, Germany, Saudi Arabia and Australia. The house and I live in New Zealand.

My main reason for choosing an international flat is to learn more about the world. Different religions, cultures and ideas. However, it has occured to me that it is useful for social anxiety.

The reason is that these people came here, quite isolated. They find it difficult to integrate because of their broken English and alien culture. Because of these things, they find it difficult to make friends of their new country. They are more receptive and less likely to be dismissive because of social anxiety.

What I mean by this is that social anxiety makes it very difficult to communicate. We can find it difficult to think of anything to say, can stammer, blush or be unable to make normal eye contact. I don't even know what normal eye contact is! But, my housemates are from different cultures, so are more forgiving to poor social graces. They are desperate to practice their English also.

So, on the path to social confidence, it is about making small steps that are progressively building. To conquer social anxiety, the only way is through gradual immersion into social life. This is a way to ease yourself in.

Prior to this house, I was living at home and my confidence was less. I don't really feel alot of pressure to communicate if I don't feel like it. Because everyone is quite different, it is a house full of individuals.

Whats more, there is the chance to learn a great deal about foreign countries and other languages. Possibly, you could take a lease on a house, and sub let to people you find agreeable. The Aussie guy is doing just that with this place.

Hope this is of use.


Vincent.

 

[rado31]

i think this is a very good way to recover

 

[recluse]

I'm worse when i talk to a foreigner who has poor english. I'm not sure why but i have to make an effort to speak really clearly and speak slower, whereas with people from the Uk i can relax more and speak in my own accent. Also foreign people don't have the grasp of English slangwords. Apart from that i find foreign people to be more well mannered. I notice that Asian people in particular tend to be quite shy and humble, and well mannered.

 

[Vincent]

I guess if you are using slang words, and are aware that they might not understand, then that awareness could be used to explain what you mean when using localized language.

You could always explain that slang.

But that is a good point Recluse.

I spent three years as an English teacher in Taiwan, so I am used to having to explain language. I guess too that I have a better awareness of the difficulties Chinese people face when trying to learn English. For example, Chinese doesn't have plurals for objects. One book, two books.
Yi ben shu, liang ben shu. Meaning one [classifier] book, two [classifier] book. As I can speak basic Chinese, I can grasp some of the fundamental differences. Not so with my German housemate and her friends. I don't anything about the German language, but could do if I wanted to be a more effective communicator/teacher. I just know that they struggle wth "w" and usually pronounce it as "v"..."vot do you vont?"



I can verifiy what you say about Asian people being well mannered and self depreciating from my experience abroad and in New Zealand. It is the emphasis on collective thinking in Asia in contrast to individuality in the West.

Cheers.

Vincent.