Fear of failure
- Thread starter vegitotwo
- Start date
JCS008
Well-known member
You have to accept failure and success go hand in hand. By not trying, that's your only guarantee that you will fail.
If you are interested in a woman let's say, but not asking her out, due to a fear of rejection, you've already failed. But if you do ask her, if she does say no, then at least its certain and you don't have to wonder about it.
If you are interested in a woman let's say, but not asking her out, due to a fear of rejection, you've already failed. But if you do ask her, if she does say no, then at least its certain and you don't have to wonder about it.
You're absolutely right! Sometimes I'm able to psyche myself up enough to just go for it, or say f**k it! But sometimes it just doesn't work. Sometimes I'm so convinced that I'll screw up that even when I do try to force myself to do whatever it is that I'm so afraid of, I actually DO screw up because of my negative thoughts.
this_portrait
Well-known member
Yup, I definitely have a fear of failure. I'm always afraid that someone else is going to steal the limelight from me (which happens more often than I like), and that my work is just going to be swept under the rug and ignored. This then brings on the feelings and thoughts of not being good enough.
faithnomore
Banned
Thats true. I am so worried about not being able to do anything, and i do avoid things/places. The problem is that if i have tried in the past i have been rejected, and i'm fed up with it.
I am desperate for success, but i dont think it's possible.
Sinar_Matahari
Well-known member
I am the same way. My fear of failure has kept me from accomplishing things that I would have loved to have accomplished by now. Failure is especially devastating to me. It doesn't even matter whether others know that I've failed. I am not a perfectionist in a conventional sense but if I something doesn't come to me naturally on the first try I don't try any further out of fear of the "inevitable" failure.
There have been times where I tried and tried and I just didn't do well in something this was even more demoralizing. I hate that if I can't be great at something then I have to feel stupid or inferior! I want to be seen as well as see myself as a person of importance and I know that I could easily be happier with mediocrity if it weren't for this mentality. My flaw is that I cannot accept anything less than perfection.
If it weren't for my SA and lack of faith in myself my perfectionism could actually have pushed me to achieve something great. I do want to accomplish great things and be given credit for them but then I'm terrified of being a leader or doing anything that is "above my level". I'm terrified of being at the center of attention and scrutiny.
You mentioned how people lie to themselves. Well, I wish it were that simple for me. I can't lie to myself because I know that I'm lying to myself and then I feel like a fool.
People with SA should all get together and start companies and businesses. Power in numbers! lol We'd feel a lot more confident if we worked around people who we knew could understand us.
There have been times where I tried and tried and I just didn't do well in something this was even more demoralizing. I hate that if I can't be great at something then I have to feel stupid or inferior! I want to be seen as well as see myself as a person of importance and I know that I could easily be happier with mediocrity if it weren't for this mentality. My flaw is that I cannot accept anything less than perfection.
If it weren't for my SA and lack of faith in myself my perfectionism could actually have pushed me to achieve something great. I do want to accomplish great things and be given credit for them but then I'm terrified of being a leader or doing anything that is "above my level". I'm terrified of being at the center of attention and scrutiny.
You mentioned how people lie to themselves. Well, I wish it were that simple for me. I can't lie to myself because I know that I'm lying to myself and then I feel like a fool.
People with SA should all get together and start companies and businesses. Power in numbers! lol We'd feel a lot more confident if we worked around people who we knew could understand us.
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Be alright if it wasnt for idiots contradicting you every 5 mins when you try something new or watever. They know your nerves is your weak point and they just make it hell for you,just to big them up and think there special.
There are some right t*ss*** out there....
or am I just too over sensitive
zlench
Well-known member
I don't like to try anything new because I already know from past experiences that I have failed many things of I find that I always have a fear of failing in my head and just turn around say what's the point of doing anything when you just know that your just going to fail.
NothingElseMatters
Well-known member
Be alright if it wasnt for idiots contradicting you every 5 mins when you try something new or watever. They know your nerves is your weak point and they just make it hell for you,just to big them up and think there special.
There are some right t*ss*** out there....
or am I just too over sensitive
you couldn be more right.
lots of people getting in my way conciously or unconciously.I try to use my anger against them as a motivation.Not healthy but it works sometimes
for me too one failure is devastating.i usually end up being depressed for some time before i can try anything again.
Sinar_Matahari
Well-known member
Be alright if it wasnt for idiots contradicting you every 5 mins when you try something new or watever. They know your nerves is your weak point and they just make it hell for you,just to big them up and think there special.
There are some right t*ss*** out there....
or am I just too over sensitive
Well, I think that sometimes we are over-sensitive but then there are times when people are clearly contradicting you to be assholes. I think they make it obvious when they are trying to be difficult.Just because we suffer from SA doesn't mean that we are devoid of gut instinct. I normally just don't respond to them or I look at them with a blank stare. Then they don't know what it is that you're thinking and they get paranoid.
i do that ALOT
this too. especially the saying "f**k it" part, I do that alot to overcome the "fear"
El.Sonador
Well-known member
"" The trouble with wanting something is the fear of losing it, or never getting it. The thought makes you weak."" -- From Max Payne 2: The Fall of Max Payne
JA2007
Well-known member
Same here. I hate competition. I automatically assume the other person will prevail over me, which may not be the case. I'll never know because as soon as I see that someone else is as good or better than me at something, I decide I'm not as good as them and give up.
JA2007
Well-known member
This is me exactly! I'm terrified of having a job where people can scrutinize me. I would love to be a leader, but I'm so scared. It's so stupid too because I'm miserable with the jobs I've had already because they were bitch work jobs. It seems like I should go for something better because it's not like what I'm doing is easy.