Experiences that suggest bipolar?

[InfraRecon]

I had my two best friends over today. We all get along well and I'm usually happy to have them over, (even if I do stress out wondering whether they're bored when I'm hosting, but that's beside the point).
I'm usually happy round them and always try really hard to be positive and fun around my friends, but more and more recently I've been unable to pretend to be happy when I feel depressed.
I was fine when they arrived, we kind of just chilled/ watched TV etc. and had some laughs but suddenly I just felt like I didn't want them to be there anymore and I didn't want to do anything else. It's a horrible feeling, just feeling gutted and lifeless, absolutely no enthusiasm and indifferent to everything. I tried to be nice about it and I kind of politely asked if they could leave (I think I just said I didn't feel well). I felt terrible when they left and felt like I was treating my friends as disposable. That isn't the case, I value their friendship and all they do and I'm a bit afraid it'll come off like I could care less if see them or not. This doesn't just happen when in company, and happens often. I have often analyzed previous similar occasions, some going right back to my childhood, and I am sure that I am an undiagnosed bipolar. My dad is bipolar and has a very hard time dealing with it, (he is currently bedridden and very ill), and I have looked up the genetics of the condition that suggests it can be inherited.
I know professional advice and diagnosis should be sought, but I would like to know if anyone on here can shed some light on this? Thanks

 

[commenter39]

Can't understand what u really wonder, u know what the symptoms are , u know someone who has it...

 

[upndwn]

I'm bipolar so I might be able to give you some pointers. The scenario you mention sounds mostly like depression to me. Have you had any manic episodes?

 

[InfraRecon]

Well I can sometimes be absolutely thrilled to be doing something; playing music, being with my friends, anything, and maybe halfway through just stop and wish that I was somewhere else/ alone. Also, really sudden urges to do something can be replaced by indifference the moment I begin to do it. *In case it sounds like I am, I'm not looking to convince myself that I am bipolar, I just kinda wanna discuss it* (I have met people who appeared to want to labelled, if you know what I mean?)

 

[BiWinning]

I'm bipolar(hence the pen name) , but usually tend to hang on the depressive side, though I do get really excited once in a while, how long have you been acting this way? As in was it recent by months or days?

 

[upndwn]

This site (NIMH · Bipolar Disorder) has lots of useful information about bipolar disorder. I suggest you take it up with your doctor as well. It is important you catch this illness as soon as possible. The earlier you can start treatment the easier it will be to handle the disorder. It has taken me 17 years to get a diagnosis and it's just now that I have found a treatment which generally works.

 

[InfraRecon]

luckycharms - I can't say that I've ever realised any thought coming over me when my mood turns, no. It's really like suddenly finding myself in a different state with no prior warning.

BiWinning - This isn't a recent thing by any means. What I meant by childhood is like thinking back to a memory where I remembered feeling inexplicably bleak all of sudden, obviously back then being unaware of states such as depression, and it serves as an explanation for many things like that when I was younger. I don't have many 'highs' it has to be said, which means it could be depression - I have heard that the manic episodes are often scarce, with it (like you said) hanging more on the depressive side.

upndwn - thanks, I'm checking it out now

 

[dazedgal]

You might be. I'm bipolar. it sucks. but the psychiatrists (yes i had two), decided that's still too mild so i was diagnosed with chronic/ clinical depression i keep forgetting which. I miss my medication. it was so good, it was working. But i OD'd on it and no one trusts me around medication. just go see a psychiatrist, don't trust mental people like me... Word of advice, people might treat you a little different (cautious) when around you when they find out, atleast that's what happened to me.

 

[redtear]

It doesn't sound like it to me. I think what you are thinking of is the "bipolar" that movies and such depict. A very rapid change in mood literally from one minute to the next.

Bipolar disorder is diagnosed by having a combination of depressed episodes and manic episodes. The depressed episodes last for quite some time. Up to 9 months if untreated. The manic episodes last around a week.

Symptoms of a manic episode are: (need 3 or more with one being mood)
elevated mood
distractability
indiscretion (such as gambling, sexual promiscuity, risk taking behavior)
grandiosity
flight of ideas
increased activity
decreased sleep
talkativeness

Symptoms of depression include: (need 5 or more with one being mood)
depressed mood (no ****? lol)
decreased interest in pleasarable activities
guilty feelings or feelings of worthlessness
decreased energy
decreased concentration
change in appetite/sleep (either increased or decreased)
slowed movements or speech or thought
suicidal ideation

Sorry so long! Psych is kinda my thing ::