Education

[xmisunderstoodx]

Hi. I'm 17. Going to be a senior in high school next year. I am 1 1/2 credits deficient. My GPA at best is probably 2.0. My mom says she'll be surprised if I even graduate high school. All I need to do is take 3 classes this summer and I'll be caught up. I was thinking to myself should I drop out and get my GED or something. Because even if I do graduate it won't mean anything. I wanted to improve my grades, go to community college, and maybe transfer to a 4-year university to redeem myself because I really did value my education in the beginning.

I feel really bad because this all started with my social anxiety issues in ninth grade. That was only one of the problems. I really believed I was a smart, intelligent person who was just socially awkward and needed to work on their social skills. I realize I'm a sucky person in all areas. No one supports or believes in me anymore. My mom has given up on me already. She's just going to watch what happens and knows I will fail but won't help. All I want is her support.

She never wanted to get that involved in my life and gets irritated when she has to do regular mom stuff. I know I am responsible for my life and I'm not blaming her or anyone but it would have helped or changed some things.

I don't know what to do with myself.

I'm willing to work extra hard and put in the effort. It's hard to do when my mother seems to keep being discouraging by reminding me of how I'm fat, not that pretty, and lazy.

Sorry, that's the end of my rant. I have no one to really talk to.

 

[TreeBones]

I know exactly what you're going through.
You're so lucky to only be 1 1\2 credits behind, please take it from me and make it up in the summer..Graduate!
A lot of us with SA are really hard on ourselves, all the things you just wrote about yourself are more than likely not true.
Don't worry so much about your mom and start living and studying for yourself.
when you succeed she will be proud.
I believe in you ! :thumbup:

 

[Lilly789]

Firstly - Mature up and ignore your mother. Move out if necessary. Sorry to sound harsh, but you will ALWAYS have people trying to pull you down throughout your life, it doesnt really change, and these will include people within your family. My mother does the same thing to me. How you react to it is your decision - yes its *extremely* difficult, but its not complicated. Your choice is to fix it - or not fix it.

also - I had a lot of difficultly in school keeping grades up, despite not finding the work itself difficult, because of social issues. I failed first year university - it wasnt that I couldnt handle the work, I just couldnt handle the work while in that social situation on campus.

so I left campus, and did it externally (distance education / correspondance / online, whatever you want to call it). I never needed to go to a class because of this.

By doing this, I finished a 3 year degree in two years and was invited to join the Golden Key society (top 15% academically in the world). Then I did Honors at one of the best universities in the world. I then got another degree, and then another half, and now doing my Masters.

My point is, if something isn't working for you - change it. Not everyone learns or excels by doing the same thing as everyone else, and nothing changes all by itself.

 

[xmisunderstoodx]

Thanks. I'll mature up and deal with it. I don't why I let people get inside my head. I shouldn't expect others to lift my spirit. I need to get myself through this.

 

[Lilly789]

Thanks. I'll mature up and deal with it. I don't why I let people get inside my head. I shouldn't expect others to lift my spirit. I need to get myself through this.

haanngg on... I just want to clarify - you dont need to go through things alone - Im not saying "man up" in that way. Everyone needs support - just some times, its not going to be from the people you wish it was from.
If your mum is saying things like that to you, then she obviously has her own problems, and her problems are not your problems. I guess thats where the maturity thing comes in - knowing the difference, and when to move on, and knowing that changes in your life can only come from you.

 

[xmisunderstoodx]

Well I post here to get support and get others opinions. And I understand what you're saying. Just some days I need little push or encouragement. Like am I wasting my time, can I do this, and for what reason am I doing this? But I know all the answers need to come from me. I shouldn't depend on others. I just wanted to get this out because Im going insane and wanted advice. I know what I need to do so I should stop whining. But I am a strong, touch person. Not weak. And if I am weak, I'm toughening up.