freestylemonster
Banned
Well, it's subconscious for me because I am a positive person. I don't put myself down. When I read about AvPD having to do with extreme low self-esteem my conscious mind is like, "What...? That doesn't make sense at all!" Because consciously, I compliment myself and I genuinely think I'm an okay person. I have a lot of positive traits and my flaws are positive too in that they demonstrate I'm human. So the low self-esteem must be entirely subconscious. And the subconscious, well...it's the reason my flight instinct kicks in when I'm in social situations.
Holy crap. This describes my predicament perfectly! I mean, I genuinely think I'm a great guy. I can make my friends laugh, (I think) I'm pretty good-looking...yet I'm just super scared to talk to people and when people try talking to me my mind gets all cluttered and foggy so I can't think of anything to say...even when I can think of something to say I'm just too scared to say it..It's REALLY annoying!!