Does your SA operate at a completely "unconscious" or invisible level?

Well, it's subconscious for me because I am a positive person. I don't put myself down. When I read about AvPD having to do with extreme low self-esteem my conscious mind is like, "What...? That doesn't make sense at all!" Because consciously, I compliment myself and I genuinely think I'm an okay person. I have a lot of positive traits and my flaws are positive too in that they demonstrate I'm human. So the low self-esteem must be entirely subconscious. And the subconscious, well...it's the reason my flight instinct kicks in when I'm in social situations.

Holy crap. This describes my predicament perfectly! I mean, I genuinely think I'm a great guy. I can make my friends laugh, (I think) I'm pretty good-looking...yet I'm just super scared to talk to people and when people try talking to me my mind gets all cluttered and foggy so I can't think of anything to say...even when I can think of something to say I'm just too scared to say it..It's REALLY annoying!!
 

JamieD

Well-known member
There's a lot more to it than what I've stated above. I admit, I don't know a lot about schizoid personality disorder, but I will say that I don't completely lack interest in social relationships. In terms of friendships, what I would like most is to have a small group of friends whom I've got some things in common with and enjoy talking to and spending some time with. I don't want a busy and active social life, and I don't particularly desire a close connection with friends or family. In regards to romantic relationships, I would love to feel close to someone, but only with the right sort of person. The possibility that person even exists is slim. I definitely do not want to be needy and desperate and end up with a false sense of security. It would take a lot for me to open up to someone. I tend to keep my emotions hidden. And for what it's worth, I also may have obsessive-compulsive personality disorder.

Sounds a bit like me actually.
 

Social_Monstrosity

Well-known member
That is exactly how I am...wow I thought I was the only one who felt this way. It seems that with everyone else's SAD, it's much more obvious and visible.
 
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