Ya got nowhere to go but up. And you can rise up. Just read up on it, get help from people who specialize in SP. And just do it! Take your life into your own hands cause nobody but you is able to make your life better. Take responsibilty, cause now that you know whats wrong with you, you have a chance to actually live for once. Just think about it, get better and you get to do everything for the first time. In a sense, you have more to live for than people without SP. Simply because, you got so much great stuff for your future. Even if you're 70, you now have so much more to look forward to then any other 70 year old i garuntee. And if you're younger, then even better cause that means you got a head start on a lot of other people on this forum.
Its up to you to make your life better. And you can do it if you want it badly enough.