dependin on others for happiness + seeking approval

[roseycheeks]

Feel free to move if this is in the wrong forum...

the title pretty much sums up my problem.. I'm sick of it. i realise how dependent I am on others' for my own happiness and i care way too much about what other people think of me. it sadens me that i would go out of my wa yto put others' happiness and needs before my own..

I agree with other people.. because I want to 'impress' them i guess.. and i feel this has worked over the years.. because people like me and think im 'nice'.. but i feel so ****ing fake..

I always tell my self that i will go into a situation and be 'myself' .. have my own opinions etc.. but when im there in person, face to face with someone.. it never happens.. yet again return to my stupid ass kissing mode.

Do others feel like this? has anyoen else gotten over these feelings.. and HOW. ?! any advice appreciated.

 

[Steppen-Wolf]

I think they key here is learning to be proud of being different.

You can't expect to be yourself and that 100% of the people will like you, but then again, why should you try to impress people who can't even appreciate who you are?

My best advice would be to take a middle of the road approach, not taking an "in your face" I'm different attitude, as that tends to alienate people, but still being sincere as to your opinions.

In simpler words, just be yourself but don't stop being diplomatic with people. That probably won't earn you a fan club, but people will tend to respect you more and the right people will like you.

 

[bigcat1967]

I feel the same way. I'm practicing now trying to throw my weight around - but I have an advantage since I'm 6'6" - 250 lbs. I'm lifting weights and try to remind myself of that. I keep on telling myself that I'm taller and bigger than everyone else and ppl should be scared of me.

I'm trying to change that thinking around anyway. It is tough to do though.