dealing with loneliness

[andy103185]

I don’t know if I’m looking for advice or just someone who understands how I feel listen to me… Anyhow I’ve always have had issues with social anxiety ever since I was a teenager. In recent years I have been doing a lot better with it, putting myself in social situations get myself outside my comfort zone etc.

This past weekend though I went to Pride with my roommate, and he had this guy hitting on him, and while I was watching this it dawned on me I haven’t been in a real relationship… really ever and I’m 27. It really never bothered me before (ok some...) but lately I have been feeling so damn lonely and I cry uncontrollably whenever I think about it. I just start thinking that unless I change something in myself this profound loneliness is never going away. I worry that someday I’m going to die and I’ll be sad and all alone. Sadly because the way I am my only real friend I can talk to is my roommate but it’s hard for me to talk to him about this stuff because he’s this huge social butterfly and honestly I get jealous sometimes how easy it is for him to be out there.

 

[sai]

when i pray to god everything gets well... i will pray for u.... u will get well... :thumbup:

 

[mikebird]

There is something intriguing with loneliness

I've been this way since 2001 when I was 25. Life was at its best before then. It may never change, but I don't give up. I feel kinda stable. But I can't bring anything in to anyone else's life

There won't be any arguments

Although, now you mention it, maybe this is why I never get on with recruiters.

 

[nicole1]

*hug* Relationships aren't easy and are hard to come by for a lot of people... Internet dating is handy, or doing a meet up for singles.

I found a list of where to meet people, and it may have to mean you being a bit more forward in this department.

Yes, I'm there now. I do hate loneliness, but I hate being in a relationship just to end loneliness even more.

Ask your friend to set you up if you are having trouble. Friends are helpful in this way, also.

 

[drakir]

if you look at some of my other posts then you pretty much get my view on love xp

i choose to be lonely.. im a lone wolf... i do not really enjoy being with alot of people... i mean.. if you dont count the obvious anxiety isuue

 

[Diend]

Its weird that you assume that whats good for some people is also good for you. If you were really the type to enjoy a relationship wouldnt you think you wouldve had the motivation to be in one already? The media perpetuates being in a relationship as positive. But it is not good for everyone.

 

[andy103185]

Thanks everybody, I appreciate everything you've said. I dont think its so much I choose to be alone its just... always been the easier route. Its always been so hard to connect with others that eventually is was just easy to stop trying. Now I feel like I have let to much time pass and I don't know how to put myself out there (ok I kinda fear it).

 

[upndwn]

I haven't really had a relationship either and I'm 34. Sure there's been a fling or two but usually it ends with me being hurt or disappointed. I guess I kind of have lost hope in finding anyone I could truly be with, having so many issues myself I have an urge to find someone that's flawless to fill the void of my own failures.

I hope you find someone andy103185, no one should go through life alone. We are all humans with the same needs and desires and we all crave closeness, compassion and intimacy.