comparing yourselfto others/ insane jealousy

[xtina_fan81]

since I have been displaying really intense jealousy of people on facebook recently (you know how i mean), I spoke to one of my online friends about it, and she has actually had similar experiences to me in the past so it has really helped to talk to her about things before. and basically she just said i have to get over it. plain and simple. but its obvsly not that easy. she said theres always more to peoples lives than what i think and what you see on facebook, and alot is just a front. Im just ALWAYS feeling like theres everyone else doing their thing all the same, then theres me seperate.

i just want to feel one of them. and i dont think thats a real crime but she said im not like them, because i am not them. its so hard to just accept this when its going on ALL the time and i am literally the ONLY one who doesnt seem to have a bunch of people to go out with all the time. she said i should quit trying to understand why i dont have it. and basically i have to be ok with being so different. and know i cant have what they have and be happy about it. it doesnt help that im as stubborn as hell but i kinda refuse to be ok knowing i cant have what they have. i sposed to celebrate feeling like an alien compared to everyone else. i just cant comprehend that right now. just thought id share and see if a anyones battled similar thoughts?

 

[Elenwen]

I've actually stopped looking at people's Myspace pages because I feel like I haven't done enough with my life compared to them. The only time I look at other people's pictures is when I'm feeling self-destructive, because it always sends me in this spiral of jealousy and anger (at myself for not putting in the work to build relationships and at them for seeming to succeed with so little effort, even though I know that's a ridiculous way to look at it).

It's completely irrational to be jealous of other people's lives because, as your friend said, what we see is only the surface--everyone has their own trials, and some people hide them better than others. For example, I had a friend in high school that I thought was incredibly well-adjusted and smart; she seemed to be happy all the time and she succeeded at everything she tried. I didn't find out until our senior year that she had tried to kill herself when she was a sophomore--and we were very close, like sisters. I understand how hard it is not to compare yourself to them; it's only human. But try to concentrate on what YOU do well, rather than what you feel like you OUGHT to do well.