Can't be bothered

[theslowesthand]

Don't know if it's really that much of problem, but as of late has gained my "interest"

It is that i seem to have lost all interest in the oppsoite sex (women)

In real life (not porn) i just have no intereset in them (getting to know, having reltionship with). I don't mind being friendly to them (eg at shop-counter), but am not even slightly interest anything more than such friendly "shop-banter"

I still do lust after the odd one, here-and-there, but i wouldn't really want to ACT on that (seem to prefer just the feelings of lust, but not the complications eg sex (??). Or maybe i've just looked at way too much porn in my life?

Or maybe its due to a life spent in isolation .. with little or none real women contact .. and the little "stimulation" they DID offer to me in past (eg lust), has now gone?

Whatever. I dunno.

The thing is, there's at least one young woman ("Lusty") in "town" that i know for sure is "into" me (& wants to start a relationship), & 2 others who are definate maybe's (have shown some IOI's to me, which i picked up on; one of of these ("Friendly") work in same shop as Lusty). I first recieved IOI's from Lusty 2 or 3 years ago, when she first started working there (at the chemist where i get my meds from). One time we made full eye contact for several seconds whilst i was talking to another staff member (she was just standing there staring at me!). Another time (just recently) she did the walk-away-look-over-shoulder thing. One time i overheard Firendly/Lusty saying 'he's so frustarting'.
I'm not dumb, i have picked up on these things. And as i said before it's not really a problem - i could care less what happens (well to be honest i'd rather nothing happen).
The (minor) problem is only that i am a little confused about what i should do (not that i'd do anything! - as i've NEVER "done anything" concerning women - & nowadays i don't WANT to do anything). I like Friendly better, and she's much friendlier (always smiles when talking to me, & constantly giving me the "glad-eye" i think). Lusty makes me nervous.
I'm not the type of guy who approaches women .. its all SLOW .. SLOW .. SLOW with me - SO slow that nothing has ever happened, but i can't handle things moving any faster than that.

But the above situation is really just a symptom of my general "malaise" concerning women that i have nowadays. I just don't see the point of ever having a "relationship" (i seem to be quite happy living life in my own "solitary little bubble of one", with virtually none social contact of any sort, male or female), or sex (i can hug my pillow, "jerk-the-gerkin" - DONE). Sex/relationships = just seem to me like adding an awful lot of ongoing complications to life, when my mind is already totally full of complex computer/techno/other stuff already.
My libido is usually very low or non-existent (so don't need sex partner to resolve my "lust problem"), & i seldom have any contact with (attractive) women in real life (& even if do, the lust is quickly overtaken by other feelings like boredom with the object of lust)
I seldom get lonely (so don't need company/reassurance/etc via relationshp)

So WHY should i ever have an "relationship"???

 

[divethruhaze]

Edited post
=========

 

[redski]

Don't know if it's really that much of problem, but as of late has gained my "interest"

It is that i seem to have lost all interest in the oppsoite sex (women)
...

I think I know where you are coming from. The last time I had interest
in a women which was a few years ago it turned out to nothing and
it was an emotional roller coaster of the battle between logic and feelings
and my SA.
Needless to say I am not interested in that happening again.
Since that time I have not been romantically or physically interested in
the opposite sex. Just being friends but not more then that.

However as I get older and nothing is happening I worry a little.

To give some form of answer to your question.
My old man once said to me about relationships:
"It is when two people want the samething at the same time"

Maybe that time is not now.

 

[SlipStream7]

I've felt the same way for the past year. I also spend way too much time alone in my dorm (I have a single room) and pretty much all my friends know it. Whenever I've even become vaguely interested in a girl, they overwhelm me with comments about how "social" they are and how they like to be outgoing. Once I hear stuff like that I immediately back down and give up with them, simply because that isn't me.

Maybe it's the fact that I'm at college, but it seems like everyone is such a social butterfly and they constantly are doing and saying things to let everyone know that they are....which in turn makes people like me feel infinitely worse about the fact that I'm not "Mr. Confident." I'm at the point now where I literally hate most of the people at my college....including even my friends. I feel like everyone else's goal is to make me feel as inept as possible in comparison to them....and that's just such a shitty way to treat people.....so **** them. One more ****ing year and I'm out of this hell hole. Hopefully the working world hosts nicer people who aren't self centered pricks who boost their own ego by messing with other people's egos.

 

[Richey]

yeh im not asexual but if you dont know me you'd be sure i was because i've hardly ever had girlfriends, i only had one when i was 22, a few years ago now and since then i just cant be bothered. because i live with two girls and work with 7-10 girls. there is a generic trend in the sorts of guys they go for and i dont really think in terms of that. i prefer to talk about music or tv, topics unrelated to gossip which doesnt interest me at all. i definitely know im straight but asking a girl out seems like such an awkward situation and really i havent connected with a girl enough where i feel comfortable in doing that. also i tend to talk very calmly but still articulate without shoing off ...

its really hard to explain but this last year after going to uni and work ive realised that perhaps being single might just be something that suits my perosnality more then other people. i dont feel cool enough or something. certain people have a confidence and a swagger about them, my natural behaviour is to live a private almost reclusive life because of my self consciousness. i can talk to people though, thats what annoys me, i know i could possibly make friends or find a girlfriend but the belief isnt always there.