Busy! Busy! Always too busy!

[Checkonit22]

So I've gotten a text today. Someone I haven't talk to in a long time. Friend says she was too busy. So, I want to reply and basically end it all because we all know that if someone who is interested in you will make time for you even if it's just a few minutes - and that's the honest truth.

I don't want to be mean, but I want to be direct, and just dissolve the so-called friendship. This is someone who'd at one time I was very interesting in but now I want to send a subliminal message that I really don't care where the friendship goes from here on out. The song "Somebody That I Use To Know" comes to mind. I'm thinking saying one of the following like this:

Friend: Sorry I've been so busy lately!
Me: Don't apologize. You'd blown me off a long time ago. All the best in your career.

-or-

Me: Don't apologize. doesn't matter anymore. But good luck with what your doing.

Comments and advice appreciated!

 

[IntheLabyrinth]

Was it just an open ended invite or was it for like sometime this week?

 

[ImNotMyIllness]

I never do stuff like that. I just put them in the "whatever" category. At that point they are no longer a friend. I may reply and say something polite but I keep it terse. Personally, I don't see any point in going further unless: A. You want to make them feel bad or B. Clarify their feelings towards you, apologize and work harder at being a better friend.

"A", is vengeful and B is messy and needy. That's why I don't stress over it.

 

[Checkonit22]

I never do stuff like that. I just put them in the "whatever" category. At that point they are no longer a friend. I may reply and say something polite but I keep it terse. Personally, I don't see any point in going further unless: A. You want to make them feel bad or B. Clarify their feelings towards you, apologize and work harder at being a better friend.

"A", is vengeful and B is messy and needy. That's why I don't stress over it.

Your right. I do want them to feel bad. It's to a point where I'm only a friend if they need something done or something along those lines. I feel like if I do say something it's mean and vengeful, if I don't say anything or reply with something nice, I feel like what they're doing is okay and I'm walked over. It's a double edge sword.

What would you think I reply randomly "Wish you all the best". And thats it? Still vengeful?

 

[razzle dazzle rose]

If I felt the way you do about the friendship, I would just ignore the text and not write anything back. That is what I did on new year's when this friend texted me. I am just not interested in being in touch with someone so flaky, and I don't have much in common with her these days either. Still, it may be beneficial to keep her around (she did introduce me to this awesome sushi place). What I am trying to say, if you can deal with it, don't sever any ties. It is best to keep a distance, but still keep it friendly.

 

[Checkonit22]

If I felt the way you do about the friendship, I would just ignore the text and not write anything back. That is what I did on new year's when this friend texted me. I am just not interested in being in touch with someone so flaky, and I don't have much in common with her these days either. Still, it may be beneficial to keep her around (she did introduce me to this awesome sushi place). What I am trying to say, if you can deal with it, don't sever any ties. It is best to keep a distance, but still keep it friendly.

I understand. And you may have a strong point. I also loathe the idea of someone so narcissistic would even notice me gone.

Thanks I will follow this advice and keep it in mind for further situations.

 

[cocorose]

I never do stuff like that. I just put them in the "whatever" category. At that point they are no longer a friend. I may reply and say something polite but I keep it terse. Personally, I don't see any point in going further unless: A. You want to make them feel bad or B. Clarify their feelings towards you, apologize and work harder at being a better friend.

"A", is vengeful and B is messy and needy. That's why I don't stress over it.

I agree.. I would just not say anything. If they are too busy for you then I wouldn't even waste my time on them. Just acknowledge the friendship is over (if that's what you want) and move on.

If you do want to continue the friendship, and you want to let them know it hurts your feelings that they're not making an effort, then let them know but not in a spiteful way.

 

[lonelee1]

wow, that's annoying. when someone texts you out of nowhere saying they've been too busy or, 'sorry i haven't written' or something like that. as if i were waiting by the phone for them! lol.

if you really want to end it, maybe just don't reply. they'll get the hint that it's over and also probably feel bad that you didn't answer lol.

or be nice and say, 'hey, thanks for the text. hope you're well.' and leave it at that.