I had thought that I had been getting much better and making progress but now I am just becoming scared. Thursday I had an abnormal psychology class, I considered not going but then I thought... ah well, I might as well, I don't want to loose any attendance (yes, sad-- my uni class has an attendance policy). The class was going to cover phobias, including social phobia.
Well sure enough, the teacher goes over social phobia... and most of what he said seemed to be pretty correct although it seemed that he tried to down play the severity that the disorder can have on people's lives and once again there was an effort to make it seem like a simple problem with a simple solution- learn to laugh at yourself-- end the negative thinking--- gain self-esteem--- yes, in theory all of that is correct and helpful albiet much easier for a person without a shy temperment and bad life experiences to do.
But, to digress, all that didn't bother me so much, what bothered me was when he got to a what I found particularly sensitive subject--- fear of negative or incorrect evaluation + self-esteem problems-- somebody without failure, yells out something sarcastic about the pathetically weak socialphobe, it envolves socializing, of course it is easy and natural- what stupid people! those socialphobes :roll: (not in those words exactly). I didn't exactly make out everything that he said because of my anxiety level but tried to play along and look normal.. I tried to laugh, a weak giggle, but I couldn't do it any longer and I felt my face flush. Finally it ended. I stayed in the class because I have another class in the same room, and, as people walked they all were very quiet and it felt like they were looking at me as if I were pathetic and crazy! yes, I know it was the social anxiet speaking...
but that isn't the end of it.... I shall continue on the next post... sorry for ranting so long, but I feel I must get all of this out, I have nowhere else to do so... ironic but I thought that I would never post here again...
Well sure enough, the teacher goes over social phobia... and most of what he said seemed to be pretty correct although it seemed that he tried to down play the severity that the disorder can have on people's lives and once again there was an effort to make it seem like a simple problem with a simple solution- learn to laugh at yourself-- end the negative thinking--- gain self-esteem--- yes, in theory all of that is correct and helpful albiet much easier for a person without a shy temperment and bad life experiences to do.
But, to digress, all that didn't bother me so much, what bothered me was when he got to a what I found particularly sensitive subject--- fear of negative or incorrect evaluation + self-esteem problems-- somebody without failure, yells out something sarcastic about the pathetically weak socialphobe, it envolves socializing, of course it is easy and natural- what stupid people! those socialphobes :roll: (not in those words exactly). I didn't exactly make out everything that he said because of my anxiety level but tried to play along and look normal.. I tried to laugh, a weak giggle, but I couldn't do it any longer and I felt my face flush. Finally it ended. I stayed in the class because I have another class in the same room, and, as people walked they all were very quiet and it felt like they were looking at me as if I were pathetic and crazy! yes, I know it was the social anxiet speaking...
but that isn't the end of it.... I shall continue on the next post... sorry for ranting so long, but I feel I must get all of this out, I have nowhere else to do so... ironic but I thought that I would never post here again...
