avpd at work

[LazyHermitCrab]

I need help. So i've been at this retail job for a year and 2 months. I still can't talk to anyone really other than "hey" and sometimes "hello how are you?" The entire time at work i try to avoid my coworkers to the best of my ability which is nearly impossible. Sometimes work isn't horrible, but if certain coworkers/managers come in, it really is. Today the obnoxious one was there and i think he was making fun of me and called me a ten year old and then he comes up and he says hello "all friendly" and smirks. So yeah how fakely nice. Also it's difficult because at breaks i go to my car and don't buy food because then i would run into more people. I'm a total mess at work it's pretty pathetic at times. I'm in college and sometimes i'm afraid i'll run into people from more work, that makes it even more overwhelming. Should I quit and how? It just keeps getting worse ::

 

[gtrvspec]

When you say you still can't talk to anyone do you mean you just don't know what to say? Or is there something you don't like about some of your co workers that pushes you away?

 

[LazyHermitCrab]

When you say you still can't talk to anyone do you mean you just don't know what to say? Or is there something you don't like about some of your co workers that pushes you away?

Both lol. I guess I can talk to laid back people easier. I can't talk to these people if even one "judgemental" like person is around.. like the ones who call me quiet and stuff. It's also because there's people walking around and it feels overwhelming because someone might ask a question when i'm talking and then my thoughts are everywhere. I feel stuck in the department and want to be able to walk around but i can't do that all day :s

 

[gtrvspec]

I don't have avpd so my advice might not be helpful but hopefully it is. I've noticed that sometimes when talking to someone else we start thinking about everything BUT what that other person is saying. Our mind starts wandering and we start thinking about how we look, how we're coming across to that person, and what to say next. The key is to dedicate all your energy into concentrating on what that other person is saying. When we stop worrying about all that other stuff conversations will become a lot less tiring and thinking of what to say will just come naturally. It's really amazing how easy conversations are when we become really good listeners. Ask open ended questions, instead of "How was your weekend" ask "How did you spend your weekend?".

 

[LazyHermitCrab]

I don't have avpd so my advice might not be helpful but hopefully it is. I've noticed that sometimes when talking to someone else we start thinking about everything BUT what that other person is saying. Our mind starts wandering and we start thinking about how we look, how we're coming across to that person, and what to say next. The key is to dedicate all your energy into concentrating on what that other person is saying. When we stop worrying about all that other stuff conversations will become a lot less tiring and thinking of what to say will just come naturally. It's really amazing how easy conversations are when we become really good listeners. Ask open ended questions, instead of "How was your weekend" ask "How did you spend your weekend?".

Thanks for de advice will work on it

 

[Solitudes_Grace]

I can relate. I usually take my lunch break in my car as well. I don't like having other workers in the lunch/break room at the same time as me. I work in a grocery store, but I'm too nervous to go to the deli to order a sandwich, so I usually just buy a bag of chips or something like that and go the U-Check lane. I would buy some fruit, but I actually don't know how to buy it through the U-Check lane since it doesn't have a bar code.

I also don't really talk to any of my coworkers, except when I greet them; but even then, I only greet them if they greet me first. They probably think I'm weird, but the truth is I just don't want to talk to them. I just want to do the work, get paid, and leave. Then again, even if I wanted to talk to them, I probably couldn't anyways.

Since you are in college, you can rest easy on the fact that you hopefully won't have to deal with this job for too much longer. Are you almost done with college?

 

[LazyHermitCrab]

I can relate. I usually take my lunch break in my car as well. I don't like having other workers in the lunch/break room at the same time as me. I work in a grocery store, but I'm too nervous to go to the deli to order a sandwich, so I usually just buy a bag of chips or something like that and go the U-Check lane. I would buy some fruit, but I actually don't know how to buy it through the U-Check lane since it doesn't have a bar code.

I also don't really talk to any of my coworkers, except when I greet them; but even then, I only greet them if they greet me first. They probably think I'm weird, but the truth is I just don't want to talk to them. I just want to do the work, get paid, and leave. Then again, even if I wanted to talk to them, I probably couldn't anyways.

Since you are in college, you can rest easy on the fact that you hopefully won't have to deal with this job for too much longer. Are you almost done with college?

Yeah the break room usually has football, something like that on amongst people yelling at the tv.. and staring you down as you walk in, no thanks I'm trying to think of good snacks for the car, because not eating healthy just makes it that much harder to think. I'm the same way about greeting because if i greet first sometimes they won't hear me anyway which makes everything seem more frusterating. I have 2.3 years of college, so not exactly. I work at a grocery store too but buy groceries elsewhere because it's like being at work that much longer. If I do buy something, which is so rare during break it's the easiest thing to buy, like for you which would be chips.