Advice needed: making friends

[PisceanWisdom]

I need advice asap. I'm about to have a situation where I'll meet a group of new people for the second time, and I want to make a friend, or an acquaintance, or whatever people make at these occasions. I already have their phone numbers, (because of the nature of this meeting), so I won't have to exchange them. What do I do to start a conversation? And how can a conversation lead to a more lasting friendship?

 

[Riiya]

Class project?

Chances are there are one or two people in the group who would be outgoing enough to try get everybody to talk. Don't think too hard - just say whatever what comes to your mind. Also, I don't know if this is the case with you, but one mistake I used to make was waiting for "a comfortable pause" before I dared speaking up. Well, that pause rarely came and didn't do me any good.

Do as I say and you'd make an acquaintance at least. As for lasting friendship, I have yet to learn the secret to having one.

 

[Rise Against]

Heres a tip... plan out a whole conversation before hand, so you don't run out of things to say.

 

[gsmax5]

Class project?

Chances are there are one or two people in the group who would be outgoing enough to try get everybody to talk. Don't think too hard - just say whatever what comes to your mind. Also, I don't know if this is the case with you, but one mistake I used to make was waiting for "a comfortable pause" before I dared speaking up. Well, that pause rarely came and didn't do me any good.

Do as I say and you'd make an acquaintance at least. As for lasting friendship, I have yet to learn the secret to having one.

It's weird because, for me, outgoing people are the ones who neglect me the most. I seriously think it has to do with the way I look.

 

[Riiya]

If it's a group meeting, and if none of the people know you, I really doubt they're going to make it their mission to neglect you.

What do you mean "the way you look"? If by that you mean you don't look like you want to talk to new people... then you're probably right.

 

[PisceanWisdom]

Thank you Riiya, it's quite similar to a class project. It's a pretty small group, just me and three other people. I sympathize with the ability to make acquaintances, but not friends. I'll try to go with the moment, and just have a friendly attitude.

Rise Against, lol, that would be a fun experiment. I just tried to do that, but I don't think that I can plan out the entire convo. I just don't know what we'd talk about.

gsmax5, I know exactly what you mean. One thing that might be hopeful is that I don't think they do it on purpose. Some of the time, you might simply be below their radar, and all you have to do to step on it, is attract their attention one way or the other. (Of course, then you have to deal with that "attention"... but that's another post.)


For the love of social phobia world, I didn't expect to get responses so soon. Thank y'all.