romeno82
Well-known member
ill try to put it the most simple possible. this model is concentrated on how SP currently works, not how it originated.
to comprend social phobia we must start with our extreme low selfesteem and our need for approval. we feel that we are so ugly and with so many flaws that the only thing we can do is trying to hide it and putting on a mask. by putting on the mask we hope to get the approval and gratification that we so badly need to correcting our miserable self-esteem. the result is that our self worth is not based on our approvation of ourselfs, but its based on the approvation from others. this generates a big fear of rejection. cos if we are rejected our self-esteem sinks further and so the chanches to being approved. this fear of rejection is reinforced by the distorted perception and thinking that others will reject us for our perceived flaws. this originated because our parents accepted us only when we where strong and perfect, and this caused the rejection of a part of us. out of this need of approval we are very exposed and manipulable, extremely weak and catch on easily bad influence. So we seek approval.
let my give you a example:
you are in a group of people. you are very quiet and shy. you begin to thinking things like:
by being that way others could think im weird and will reject me.
the problem here is this. others could label me as weird. for society weird could be being a psychopat, a serial killer, or a disturbed or mentally ill person. and this kind of persons are the most hated or rejected persons. you fear to ruin your image. you have an extreme fear of rejection and the whole concentration is focused on the image that others have of you. this is social phobia.
your selfesteem is also extremely sensitive to criticism. cos you need to being approved not to be rejected.
to comprend social phobia we must start with our extreme low selfesteem and our need for approval. we feel that we are so ugly and with so many flaws that the only thing we can do is trying to hide it and putting on a mask. by putting on the mask we hope to get the approval and gratification that we so badly need to correcting our miserable self-esteem. the result is that our self worth is not based on our approvation of ourselfs, but its based on the approvation from others. this generates a big fear of rejection. cos if we are rejected our self-esteem sinks further and so the chanches to being approved. this fear of rejection is reinforced by the distorted perception and thinking that others will reject us for our perceived flaws. this originated because our parents accepted us only when we where strong and perfect, and this caused the rejection of a part of us. out of this need of approval we are very exposed and manipulable, extremely weak and catch on easily bad influence. So we seek approval.
let my give you a example:
you are in a group of people. you are very quiet and shy. you begin to thinking things like:
by being that way others could think im weird and will reject me.
the problem here is this. others could label me as weird. for society weird could be being a psychopat, a serial killer, or a disturbed or mentally ill person. and this kind of persons are the most hated or rejected persons. you fear to ruin your image. you have an extreme fear of rejection and the whole concentration is focused on the image that others have of you. this is social phobia.
your selfesteem is also extremely sensitive to criticism. cos you need to being approved not to be rejected.
