İ told her she was sweet on facebook

mcfly4823

Member
I used to like a girl who has already a boyfriend. When i learnt she had a boyfriend i have treated as a friend. Yesterday she changed her facebook profile photo. She was so sweety. İ sent a message to her" you don't have to be sweety this much" She knows i like her but we are friends now. İ thought she could understand my message wrong. İ sent another message to her " i m sorry it is like to disturb you. She havent replied my messages yet. Guys what do you say. may i disturb her. Did she to be offended. Sorry for my english.
 

Requiescat

Well-known member
Pardon me for being slow, but as I understand it you sent this young lady that first message on the actual photo, and the second message on the sane photo? Just making sure to clarify whether an actual message sent in private and a comment on the photo. Personally I don't think it's such a big issue, though if in the same situation I would tread carefully if she already knows you are interested in her. How long have you been awaiting a response? If a photo comment she may not respond; lots of people I have seen never respond or even read photo comments. If I were her I would not respond to flattery openly - especially if in a relationship, but it's impossible for me to comment fully seeing as I don't know her tendencies etc.
 

mcfly4823

Member
We know each other almost a year. She knows i interested in her. İ told her "i love you" she replied to me she has a bf. This conversation was made three months before. Yesterday she changed her photo. İ sent a private message to her. İ didint leave a comment. She saw my messages. İ waited a answer almost a day. İ know it is not a big deal to say her sweet. But i sent a second private and say apologise.
 

Megaten

Well-known member
We know each other almost a year. She knows i interested in her. İ told her "i love you" she replied to me she has a bf. This conversation was made three months before. Yesterday she changed her photo. İ sent a private message to her. İ didint leave a comment. She saw my messages. İ waited a answer almost a day. İ know it is not a big deal to say her sweet. But i sent a second private and say apologise.

If she's not responding then its probably best to leave it alone. You probably didnt offend her, but you put her in an awkward position by saying all that. Saying "its ok" might make you fall for her more and saying something like "leave me alone" could hurt your feelings. Anyways do yourself a favor and invest your time/emotion into people that are interested and keep friends just friends. We have short lives on this planet and its such a waste to spend that time being in love with those that will never reciprocate. I hope you understand what I mean.
 

Requiescat

Well-known member
I think a private message like that definitely put her in an awkward position, as Megaten quite rightly pointed out. And I must concur with the rest of his post, leave it be. We men have the annoying habit of hanging around waiting for that foot in the door whilst kidding ourselves that we are happy being friends, one of the reasons why I most strongly advise women with "friends" who have a romantic interest them to drop them; it usually ends badly. I'm sure you can find another love interest, it's a big wide world after all. Best of luck Mcfly (I can't help thinking of George Mcfly lol)
 

mcfly4823

Member
I think a private message like that definitely put her in an awkward position, as Megaten quite rightly pointed out. And I must concur with the rest of his post, leave it be. We men have the annoying habit of hanging around waiting for that foot in the door whilst kidding ourselves that we are happy being friends, one of the reasons why I most strongly advise women with "friends" who have a romantic interest them to drop them; it usually ends badly. I'm sure you can find another love interest, it's a big wide world after all. Best of luck Mcfly (I can't help thinking of George Mcfly lol)
That's why ı choose my username as mcfly[emoji2] .
I am her density lol lol lol.

Thanks guys.
 

mcfly4823

Member
If she's not responding then its probably best to leave it alone. You probably didnt offend her, but you put her in an awkward position by saying all that. Saying "its ok" might make you fall for her more and saying something like "leave me alone" could hurt your feelings. Anyways do yourself a favor and invest your time/emotion into people that are interested and keep friends just friends. We have short lives on this planet and its such a waste to spend that time being in love with those that will never reciprocate. I hope you understand what I mean.
Yes that's the reason why she didn't respond. Thank you. you made me feel better. İ won't write anything her for a long time. But i don't want to lose her for all. İ need her friendship.
 
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Sacrament

Well-known member
There are ways for you to be kind or even semi flirty without being too forward. Sending her a message and then apologizing for that message because she's not replying is like telling her you're insecure and lack confidence. You should have apologized only if she told you it made her uncomfortable. Calling her sweet or beautiful isn't really a bad thing unless you're actively coming on to her. Besides, if you want to keep her as a friend, you can't keep making her feel uncomfortable with those messages.
 

mcfly4823

Member
There are ways for you to be kind or even semi flirty without being too forward. Sending her a message and then apologizing for that message because she's not replying is like telling her you're insecure and lack confidence. You should have apologized only if she told you it made her uncomfortable. Calling her sweet or beautiful isn't really a bad thing unless you're actively coming on to her. Besides, if you want to keep her as a friend, you can't keep making her feel uncomfortable with those messages.
You are right. İ wish i didnt send an apologizing message to her. How could she possible give a responde a message like this. if i were her i would not give a responde and it doesnt mean this message was disturb me. even if i like this tybe of message i didint write anything anyway. İ did fear to understanding wrong. So i made it worse.[emoji33]
 

Sacrament

Well-known member
At the same time, her not replying is a bit rude in my book, since you said the message had been read. However, sometimes people read messages and forget to reply, happens all the time.
 

Megaten

Well-known member
Man personally I dont think it would have mattered if he apologized or not. His intentions might have been totally innocent, but once you tell someone you love them, they'll more than likely think you still do until you prove it otherwise. So him messaging her privately away from the watchful eye of her boyfriend might have been perceived as another attempt. Hence the lack of response.
 

mcfly4823

Member
Man personally I dont think it would have mattered if he apologized or not. His intentions might have been totally innocent, but once you tell someone you love them, they'll more than likely think you still do until you prove it otherwise. So him messaging her privately away from the watchful eye of her boyfriend might have been perceived as another attempt. Hence the lack of response.
Her boyfriend in another city. So he couldn't be see those messages.
 

Sacrament

Well-known member
I think he meant that if you had left that comment on the photo., the boyfriend would be able to see it, which would imply that you meant nothing by it. By messaging her privately, it implies saying things you don't really want the guy to have access to, which could make her feel uncomfortable. You did tell her you loved her, so now anything sweet or kind that you say to her could easily be interpreted as you trying to get lucky. Let a few days go by, and if she's still not replying, tell her something in the likes of 'I apologize if my message the other day seemed anything other than kind. I was only complimenting you because I thought you looked nice. Cheers :)'.

If you want to keep her as a friend, keep the touchy feely stuff to a minimum, but be playful, funny and confident. If eventually she wants anything more serious with you, you'll know.
 
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