Social Phobic Children

I think SA is biological. My 5 year old daughter has it. She is so shy around people she does not know. I took her to a playland at the local YMCA last week, and it took her quite awile to go on the complex. She is so shy. Do youo think I should eventually consider medication for her? I'm thinking 11-12 is the right age to consider it. I am just thinking of when I was in school. I was the shiest person in my grade, and I was often riduculed because of it. I don't want my daughter to go through that.

I'd hold on the medications if possible. She's still at an age that everything can change rapidly. Encourage her to be more active. Get her involved in hobbies/clubs/sports/school plays. Time will tell, but if you think that this might be an ongoing problem then yea, consult your pediatrician about this.

Some of mine is biological too. :/, I didn't even speak one word to practically anybody in first year school. I think you should atleast try the medication, and I don't think there is too much need for waiting time, you might as well try to help her out as soon as possible right?

zeroday said:

there has been speculation from studies that drugs leave permanant side effects. im not sure if 11-12 is a good age to start either, as drastic brain development occur in the brain right before puberty.

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Do you have any sources that claim this. It's the first time i have heard about it, and I would like to know more...

kyle said:

I think SA is biological. My 5 year old daughter has it. She is so shy around people she does not know. I took her to a playland at the local YMCA last week, and it took her quite awile to go on the complex. She is so shy. Do youo think I should eventually consider medication for her? I'm thinking 11-12 is the right age to consider it. I am just thinking of when I was in school. I was the shiest person in my grade, and I was often riduculed because of it. I don't want my daughter to go through that.

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Well, apparently some studies show shyness is inherited but I don't like the idea of any kid taking medication for anxiety. If she's still bad at 16+ let her make the decision herself. In the meantime, build up her confidence. Praise her (especially in front of others) and never criticize her negatively (especially in front of others).

I barely spoke when I started school and I got through (yes, there was the inevitable teasing because I was so quiet, which made me withdraw further into my shell) but as I got a little older I began to make one or two friends. I totally lacked confidence except in one area - when I was 8 my teacher told my mom in front of me that he LOVED reading my stories so I suddenly realised I was good at English! (A little bit of praise goes a long, long way )

Your little girl eventually went on the complex on her own. That's HUGE progress for a painfully shy kid. Tell her she did really well. At 5 years old it's natural and healthy to be a little bit wary of the world. I think your daughter will overcome her shyness with time because she has a huge headstart - an understanding, caring parent.

alter_ego said:

Well, apparently some studies show shyness is inherited but I don't like the idea of any kid taking medication for anxiety. If she's still bad at 16+ let her make the decision herself. In the meantime, build up her confidence. Praise her (especially in front of others) and never criticize her negatively (especially in front of others).

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I'm not sure if I want to wait that long if she has bad SA. I used to get panic attacks all the time until I was diagnosed with SA just before I turned 17. Taking meds has helped me establish a social life. I had problems with social interactions, especially once Junior high started. Bullies tend to target the most socially awkward children, and I was no exception. Junior high was very difficult for me. I often thought about suicide at the time. I don't want my daughter to go through that, although I've heard it's not as difficult fot girls to be shy than it is for boys.

kyle said:

alter_ego said:

Well, apparently some studies show shyness is inherited but I don't like the idea of any kid taking medication for anxiety. If she's still bad at 16+ let her make the decision herself. In the meantime, build up her confidence. Praise her (especially in front of others) and never criticize her negatively (especially in front of others).

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I'm not sure if I want to wait that long if she has bad SA. I used to get panic attacks all the time until I was diagnosed with SA just before I turned 17. Taking meds has helped me establish a social life. I had problems with social interactions, especially once Junior high started. Bullies tend to target the most socially awkward children, and I was no exception. Junior high was very difficult for me. I often thought about suicide at the time. I don't want my daughter to go through that, although I've heard it's not as difficult fot girls to be shy than it is for boys.

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I'd probably go along with that. I'm female and, yes, it's kind of more acceptable to be quiet and shy (not that I'm quiet nowadays! :roll: ) At school I did get picked on but it was only ever verbal teasing, never physical. and even tho it upset me at the time looking back it was pretty infrequent. I didn't have panic attacks either (I never have) mine is more generalized anxiety.

I often wish things could have been changed when I was a kid and that my parents had recognised and done something about my social anxiety by building up my confidence. It wasn't their fault really, they had a large family, very little money, Dad was in very poor health and SA was unheard of then. (BTW Mum was very shy and in addition to his physical ill health Dad suffered from anxiety so it probably IS hereditary - or environmental - my siblings were all quite shy).

Kyle, your little girl is still only five years old and still learning about the world. I personally think childhood is far too early to be considering medication. All she needs is her confidence building up and a lot of love.