Is it important for me to be at my boyfriend's little niece's birthday?

BC-chick

BC-chick

Banned
why aren't people ever answer my questions????????!! don't be afraid to type something..nothing will happen to you! it's just internet! jeezus people!
 
WeirdyMcGee

WeirdyMcGee

Well-known member
Part of relationships is taking your partner's values into consideration.
So... if family is very important to him; as It probably is-- then it would look best on you to make an effort even though it's awkward and painful for you to be there when you don't speak the language.

You don't have to, of course... but I'm sure he would appreciate the extra effort it takes for you to do such things.
It could only strengthen your bond for you to get to know his family.
 
Srijita52

Srijita52

Well-known member
WeirdyMcGee said:
Part of relationships is taking your partner's values into consideration.
So... if family is very important to him; as It probably is-- then it would look best on you to make an effort even though it's awkward and painful for you to be there when you don't speak the language.

You don't have to, of course... but I'm sure he would appreciate the extra effort it takes for you to do such things.
It could only strengthen your bond for you to get to know his family.
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Valhalla said:
I think you should go, it's not the people who gathers there that are the center of attention, but the niece. If there actually would be negative thoughts about you in the family, then you would improve the relation by at least showing up, maybe even engage in some small-talk. If you're not even there they can start making ideas about you that aren't true. If you feel that the problem is the form of the relationship I think they're having that talk with their son and not you. Maybe your apperance will make the niece happy.
Click to expand...

^I agree with both. Maybe going is a good idea here.
 
C

crazypants

Well-known member
If it were me, I'd probably feel obligated to go. But my boyfriend is pretty understanding about how I am with this stuff, so if he really wants me to go to a family event, he will tell me beforehand that we won't stay long and we can leave anytime.

Would it be acceptable to your bf if you just kind of show up and make an appearance, long enough for everyone to remember you were there, and then skedaddle? I know for me it helps to know that I'm not going to be stuck there for 5 hours!
 
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