How can I remember things for a conversation?

Hi everyone.

I wondered if I anyone knew how to remember stories and use them later when talking? I find the majority of conversations revolve around the past- films you've seen, adventures, memories. When it comes to my turn- my head goes blank, I find the connection between my mouth and my memory has been severed.
I've had experiences, but I find it hard to recall them. I find myself just sitting quietly while others waffle on about lots of different things they've done.

I wish I had a better answer I am exactly the same way. Unless totally relaxed. We tend to have this white noise of thoughts zapping in our head distracting us from better recall and fully being in the moment and listening. And then the CONSCIOUS thoughts/monologue in our heads too. I have some ADD so harddd and my short-term memory is not great anyways, so remembering stories jokes is hard. I carry a pad and pen with me, just something I gotta do.

It helps me, tho may be self-conscious whipping it out in front of people! (the pad and pencil, not something else... ::

Hey, here’s my tip.

Learn about yourself

Really study yourself. This may seem silly but I think a lot of us don’t know ourselves that well. Start with simple things. Make an about yourself page, asking yourself questions like: favourite music/food/movies, things you do on the weekend, personality, goals, best moments so far, accomplishments. Really think about it. And once you have it all on paper, Learn it! Like you did your ABC in grade 0 before you could even write.

Someone asked what I did over the weekend and I said: nothing really. A response like ‘nothing’, or ‘not much’ stops conversation really it does. But if you’re like me, and you struggle to remember stuff, you have no choice but to say ‘not much’. But you didn’t do nothing. Perhaps you did nothing new. But that person doesn’t know that. So think about a few things that you do on most weekends, and you can say that. On another occasion, someone asked what music I listen to and I also couldn’t think of it in the moment. But after they left... a whole list of bands came flooding in.

Learning these things off by heart means that they’re in your long term memory and can be accessed a lot easier than trying to think of something in the moment. You specifically mentioned how to ‘remember stories and use them later when talking?’ Do the same thing. If you have a stories page, try to think of 3 things that have happened to you that were embarrassing/funny/awesome/scary. And again learn them. I know these will be pre-packaged answers, but I figure it’s better than nothing.

Try to keep a diary sort of thing where you write these things in. Hope this helps. What do you think?

You just can't memorize stories, it comes naturally, you probably forgot them because of your anxiety , don't you feel a huge pressure when you're about to tell one?

zoulaykha said:

You just can't memorize stories, it comes naturally, you probably forgot them because of your anxiety , don't you feel a huge pressure when you're about to tell one?

Click to expand...

I guess it is supposed to come naturally...but it doesn't for some people. Esp if you feel anxious.

Well, I don't mean memorize things word for word, and exactly how you will say it. Just have a few experiences you would want to share kind of prepared (in a way). The rest of the convo should flow.