I know what youre saying very much. Although I don't have alot of friends, if any I'd class as propper ones (in the real world). But I guess now I let it be that way and stop trying. Since with anxiety and related problems being worse recently Ive felt the need to isolate alot of the trime anyway. So I would say don't see it as a problem with you. Its them. Youre not doing anything wrong. And I'd say don't try, just be you, and if they don't get that its their problem. I'm the same in that I feel I'd need to do things I don't if I really wanted what youre talking about wanting. But it doesn't feel worth it. And I don't want it TBH.