Facial blushing destroyed my life

hi everyone,

i'm 32 yrs old, i was always a shy kid, but when i turned 16, i began to experience facial blusing that caused to me become afraid of people. I wish there was an internet back then, my life might have turned out very differently. About 7 years ago, when i was 25, i began searching the internet for info on "facial blushing". I found some forums about blushing and hyperhidrosis and i even considered flying to L.A. to have surgery done to prevent blushing. I mistakenly thought that the facial blushing was the cause of my shyness and anxiety. I went to see a psychiatrist, and i found out that the reverse was true. My "social phobia" was causing my facial blushing.

I always thought that only crazy people see psychiatrists. I waited until i was 25 yrs old to see one. He put me on Paxil pills and met with me every two weeks to have some talk therapy. My shyness decreased and my blushing went away. It was amazing.

Unfortunately my social phobia had already done a great deal of damage to my life. Damage that can't be reversed. I'm considering suicide now.

Anyway, i encourage everyone here to go see a psychiatrist because it helped me back then. Good luck everybody, get help, this social phobia and blushing WILL destroy your life if you don't see a professional ASAP.

here's my email if anybody has questions.

[email protected]

I can't stress this enough, DON'T WAIT, go see a psychiatrist ASAP. I waited, because i was an ignorant kid with ignorant parents that didn't know any better. If you're really shy and blush all the time and have panic attacks like i did, a psychiatrist can CURE you of this. Don't wait until it's too late like I did. I was scared the first time i visited my psychiatrist, but a few sessions later, I felt like a different person and was not afraid of anything or anyone.

This is the first time I've run an internet search on the term "facial blushing" in almost 7 years. I was cured of facial blushing 7 years ago. But i waited to long to see a psychiatrist, don't make the same mistake i did.

readytodie said:

Unfortunately my social phobia had already done a great deal of damage to my life. Damage that can't be reversed. I'm considering suicide now.

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Hey there I've been to that place 4 weeks ago but luck pulled me out.It is never that bad.You can make new social relationships now your blushing has gone.You need to analyse your deep beliefs to get round why you think no new socialisation can occur.

NLP is a good tool for that ,and though I'm NOT qualified to give advice on NLP, maybe Michael Hall's Mind Lines might set you free from your current limiting beliefs.

I still have the blushing problem and I'm going to take your advice.Are the pills temporary or ongoing ?

i don't take pills anymore, i fucked up in school, graduated with worthless degee, can't get a decent job, time to die

Hello Ready To die - There is still hope. Never say DIE.

I head this women speak once (I was doing a transcription of her talk) about starting your life over from scratch completely at 40 years old. Your 32 years so you have an 8 year head start.

You can download her first book for free here: http://www.wishcraft.com/

Have fun going through the exercises - actually - I also think this is great for anyone any age. Takes you on a journey of self-discovery into the truly genuis talented you that's been hiding all your life.

Enjoy!

You're going to off yourself because you can't get a good job? Whoa dude. Extreme. I mean, hey - do it, I don't care. However if I were you, I'd just live an awesome rest-of-my-life and forget the past. Afterall, you're fucking cured! Just be happy at that. Use your confidence to sell cars or some shit.

I think I know where readytodie is coming from saying that there is irreversible damage. I feel the same way and I'll be 32 in less than a month. There are many rites of passage everybody is supposed to go through at certain ages: making friends, going to parties, dating, first kiss, first sexual experience, etc.

For those of us that haven't gone through ANY of that, life can feel pretty pointless. It's hard to relate to the average joe who has gone through those stages and you see the genuine shock on their faces when they find out you haven't. It's like: how did you make it to this age without doing any one of those things?

So I'm 32 and my brain hasn't been socialized beyond about 15 years of age (when this hell started). How do you start a new life at 32 when you feel you have the social experience of a 15 year old?

There is no God.

readytodie said:

i don't take pills anymore, i fucked up in school, graduated with worthless degee, can't get a decent job, time to die

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LMAO!

That is hilarious! :lol:

you dont want to die if u are ok now...Im 60 years old and been blushing since 13 years old...total nightmare...married 3 times..no friends and cant face my own family..can't go to the store unless i have a couple of drinks.i'm in eastern canada but cant find support groups here...but i'm still alive

I'm 19 years old. My facial blushing problem started about 7-8 years ago. I can say without a doubt that my blushing problem is the PRIMARY cause of me living a shitty social life. It has CRUSHED any strand of self esteem or self confidence that I always used to have as a younger kid. Every day at work is a struggle. High school was the most painful experience I have ever gone through. One of the worst things about it is that I am always on the lookout for situations in which I might blush. Therefore, I sometimes have to do or say really weird things to avoid them. People don't understand what my problem is and I cannot tell anybody about it, except for doctors about the ETS surgery. Therefore I keep myself very emotionally distant from other people in hopes of them not knowing the real me and my embarrassing problem. This seclusion causes loneliness and very often depression as well. I ended up doing drugs/drinking to help me escape the pain that my blushing problem has caused me. I can never relax and just be the REAL me around people. Over the last year I have noticed that I am becoming more and more numb to the pain. I have begun to accept life as a painful experience and that scares me very much. Unlike you, I am not blessed with a good family. There is no love in my house which probably compounds my shitty situations.

The best way I can describe myself now is a "puppet controlled by my facial blushing problem". I no longer fear hell.

Would I change as a person if I stopped blushing? I like to hope so. I sometimes wonder if I am too far gone though. I worry that I have been the way I am for 7-8 years, and that I am stuck in my ways. The teenage years were supposed to be a time of self discovery, revelations, friendships, learning of the world, meeting people, interacting with the opposite sex, and a stage of life where you take chances. I didn't do much of that. I sat in my home watching time go by thinking about my problem and how to avoid the next blushing situation. Those years were vital as the human mind is developing, learning, and setting the foundation for the future. Messed that one up pretty good, didn't I? Sure, many people here will tell you that it's important not to allow the problem to control you. I sure wish I did it that way instead. You must understand that at the age of 13 a troubled youth such as myself doesn't know any better. I really didn't have anyone to talk to about the problem either. Nobody cared to ask me what's troubling me. My parents didn't do anything to help me. At that age I believe that I was so scared that I would of spilled my problem to any adult who would show me that they wanted to help me. That is not the case any more unfortunately. I am getting the ETS procedure done soon and I can't wait. My dream is that I will get the surgery done and that I will go a week being put in all sorts of difficult situations and I will not blush once. If that happens, I hope I can finally find the courage within myself to mentally spread my wings and fly away to a better state of mind, happiness.

Hello everyone.My name is wayne,i am forty four years old and i suffer with blushing,or erythrophobia.I have sufferd with this condition since i was five years old.This condition has blighted my life or controlled everything that has happend to me.I do no how i got this problem.When i was about five i was a really shy child,and over heard my mother say to my father why have you gone red.With me being very young i thought my dad must be shy like me, so i started training my self to go red.After a while every thing i done in school,out of school i would go red.I am fairly good looking chap,lives on my own becouse of my condition,but would give anything to be with a partner and be normall like everyone else.I do relise there is a lot more people out there worse than me with worser conditions,but i would like to enjoye the rest of my life i have left before i get to old.I have been and had the operation ETS but unfortunatly it never worked for me.I still blush when i get stressed or if i feel uncomfortable.I live in bristol and i am trying to find somone who can help me.Going to the doctors is a complete wast of time i have been there,i suppose he could write a book about me where i have been so many times seeing different doctors.I do go out ie to the pub or i like to go windsurfing on a weekend.I try not to let my blushing get the better of me.If anyone has any information or would like to email me,my email address is [email protected] good luck everyone in beating your blushing.

Yeah - although I was a shy kid I still had some degree of self assurance.
You know I was quiet but never for a second thought any less of myself for it.
But at 16 - of all ages - my world seemed to explode.
I went red and blushed in the company of girls.
And I couldn't put a lid on it.
Over a few months this disease had destroyed my life.
Blushing, embarrasment, humiliations....led to.....teasing, avoidance, bullying.
And now I'm 37 - and it's improved but I still have a lot of collateral damage from those times.
I remain deeply avoidant and fearful, cannot make friends, cannot maintain relationships, cannot live my life.
I have accepted that I will never be the man I could and should have been.
That in some ways is a relief.
But in other ways it destroys my will to live and makes me feel like a complete and utter tosser and waster.
And like all of you I never for a second believed then or now that all of that trauma was my fault.