A Quick Update!

anxiousmess

Well-known member
He explained that he found the text message difficult and as he was at work when he received it. If it had been at home, he would have accepted it more. But he finds when I give him compliments - he finds it difficult as his not that way i.e receiving compliments. He apologised for not being honest but he tried to avoid confrontation and felt it would have given a bad reaction. Despite lying to my face which gave a bigger reaction.

We sat down and talked to each other. In a nutshell, he admitted he finds intimacy and personal relationships difficult. He admitted that as we work and hang out together and have a good laugh and good times. He explained he doesn't feel quite the same way as I do by loving me. But admitted it could progress in time. I admitted that I wished I didn't love him as it would make it easier to walk away especially the first time he hurt me. But as I love him - I'm the one getting hurt.

He has loved someone in the past and has had friendships where he has wanted more to progress in the past. But his scared to get close to someone in case he gets hurt. He is afraid of getting close to someone.

Although he informed he wants to give things another go and wants to be in a relationship with me.

I explained that there is no going back for me. Because if we were to give it another go - nothing would change. He needs to deal with his intimacy issues. Because I am not going to allow myself to get hurt anymore. I've had enough. I made it clear of my own expectations and he admitted he doesn't know what his expectations are.

I need space. Time away from him. I now want to focus on getting better and to make a fresh start.
 

lily

Well-known member
you've made the right decision in my very good opinion. he admitted he doesn't love you as much as you do. that's already an alert sign as you should be dating a guy that loves you just as much as you love him, good luck! he's not the only one on this earth if he's not right for you and he unfortunately really needs help from a counselor or sth
 
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grapevine

Well-known member
Im sorry you feel hurt.
He wasnt the one and he has issues. you've saved yourself alot of trouble.

Work on making you happy and realise how good a catch you are. Take care of yourself.
 
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